Exactly What I Wanted

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Family on Wednesday, April 06, 2011

Ten years ago, I almost got a Master’s degree. With a semester to go—my on-the-job training—I dropped out to make goo-goo eyes at my firstborn son. A year later, I tried again to finish, and once again dropped out, to make goo-goo eyes at my second born. My advisor became frustrated with me, asking, “When is it going to be YOUR turn?” which I suppose meant, “When are you going to pay attention to... READ MORE

When Spouses Disagree About NFP

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Marriage on Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Simcha Fisher has written a very good post about why the church doesn’t make a list for what constitutes a good reason to avoid pregnancy.

“If the Church seems distressingly vague, it’s because she doesn’t want to get in the way of the conversation you could be having with God.”

That conversation seems to me the most critical element of practicing NFP. The conversation remains open between husband... READ MORE

Released By Motherhood

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Family on Sunday, February 20, 2011

I watched the movie, “Secretariat,” this weekend. Films of man or beast running in slow motion always move me unaccountably, and the show delivered on that point—otherwise, I wouldn’t call it a great movie. Woman knows her horse is a winner, she sacrifices all to prove it, and foments the most famous racehorse in history.

There wouldn’t be a movie if the main character didn’t want something so badly... READ MORE

Growing Up Together

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Marriage on Wednesday, February 09, 2011

Coming into our marriage, I assumed that I was more spiritually advanced than my husband. I’d lived a year in poverty, chastity and obedience after all—an entire year of daily Mass, Rosary, and Benediction, plus frequent retreats, and a virtually guaranteed life of grace. Meanwhile, my husband was just a (crinkling nose) Sunday Mass Catholic.

Once or twice I thought that he was holding me back, that... READ MORE

'Independence Is Obnoxious'

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Family on Monday, January 10, 2011

A couple weeks ago, my husband and I had an argument. Things escalated, yadda, yadda, and before we knew it, three days of monosyllabic conversation sans eye contact had ensued.

Then the phone rang. It was my friend Pedge inviting us over to play cards with her and her husband. I agreed, procured a babysitter, and said to my husband, “Do you want to make up so we can go play Euchre?”

Naturally, the... READ MORE

You Cannot Steal My Joy

Features | Posted by Elizabeth Duffy in Faith on Wednesday, December 15, 2010

My friend Pedge never yells at her children. I’ve been watching for many years, hoping to catch her in a weak moment. So many mothers yell, if for no other reason, to let witnesses know that they care about their child’s misbehavior. Not Pedge.

I’ve asked her husband, “So what really happens when we’re not here? Doesn’t she ever just go crazy?” No. Her husband attests, she does not raise her voice.... READ MORE

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