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Email a FriendAt least this article was a little nice about it. I’d much rather be known as “advanced maternal age” then “geriatric pregnancy” which is what I have been known as in my last three of six. I was 35 with the 4th, 38 with the 5th and 42 with the baby.
As far as how I felt in my advanced age pregnancies, not much different than the others, BUT I did tire faster and with the last two actually had to take naps during the day. With my last I was complaining about this with some younger pregnant women and they all gasped “you mean you didn’t have to take naps with the first four…?” LOL I guess I’m doing ok for an old lady.
One HUGE plus is that I feel I’m a better mom than I was in my early years and I don’t think it all has to do with practice. I think age has had just as much to do with it.
Enjoy being pregnant ladies, at any age. Take care at any age. And listen to your body it will let you know what you need and when - most of the time we listen to ourselves about like we listen to God though, with half an ear open. :(
Advanced Maternal Age
Posted by Rachel Balducci in Family on Tuesday, July 26, 2011 10:20 PM
I came across this article recently, 40 and Pregnant, and it kinda made laugh.
The article makes some valid points about having a baby after 40 (the need to take care of your body, the importance of understanding the risks) but it also seems to take an automatic negative stance, with a bit of a positive twist:
However being 40 and pregnant is not something that has to be feared. After all, celebrity moms like Madonna, Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis all had successful pregnancies after 40.
Instead of relying on celebrity moms to endorse “advanced maternal age” (which is what they call you when you’re pregnant over 36)—why don’t we hear from some of our readers. Any women out there want to share their stories of being pregnant in your late 30s or 40-plus? What were the positive sides of this situation?
I have to give my two cents worth. I’m not yet 40, but my pregnancy with Isabel almost two years ago was my best of them all. I felt great—and maybe the biggest factor was that I was finally wise enough to pace myself! Yes I had older kids I was toting to various ball games around town, but I also knew that laying down on the couch whenever I could was one of the best things I could do, for all parties involved.
Comments
had babies at 32, 35, 38 and 41. I think the first was the most difficult. With the others, I sort of knew what to expect and I recovered much faster with the last two, which I also attribute to knowing what to expect and giving myself the proper time to heal. I am not sure what the article is looking for. if you take care of yourself and trust your doctors,I don’t see why you can’t embrace pregnancy at the age of 40 or beyond. I haven’t hit menopause yet so it is still quite possible that God may send us another blessing, I don’t feel too old for it at 43, but maybe I am?
I am 43 and pregnant with my 8th. I was sent for my 20 week ultrasound and they thought it was very important that I meet with a genetic counselor first - I declined. They said they highly recommended it for anyone over the age of 35. I laughed and said I’d had 4 since turning 35, at that point they let it go. I have to admit this one has slowed me down a lot more, but that’s OK. The other kids are so thrilled! Many of my friends are still having kids, but I think some of our relatives think we’re a bit nuts. 
Our youngest is 3 - so it’s not like my life is really changing much, we’ll still never retire
I had my last two babies at ages 38 and 43.
My daughter, born when i was 38, was born perfectly healthy. I had a little more nausea than with earlier pregnancies, but overall not too bad. When she was maybe three days old or so, I was so tired, I was worried that maybe I was in fact too old for the job. But later that day I found out I had a fever, and that’s what was making me so tired.
My son was born when I was 43. He was born with major birth defects. When he was first born and they saw all the problems they ordered chromosome tests. It was a scary time and it was not always clear that he would survive. The chromosome tests came back normal, he’s had several surgeries for the birth defects. he lives a completely normal life ( including normal intelligence). We love him so much. If we had never had him, we would have missed out on so much. The 70 days in the hospital were tough, but if we could do it again we would not only have him, but have him twice! He is the light of out lives. Really.
I can’t advocate for older births because my pregnancies, all in my late 30’s, were difficult and life-threatening for both me and the babies. The recovery from both was also extremely difficult. So I stopped at two kids (plus one in heaven). I don’t know whether if I had been younger whether my pregnancies would have gone the same way. Now that I am in my late forties I have started to have some chronic health problems which don’t make raising active boys very easy. However, there is nothing one can do about advanced maternal age if you get married at an advanced matrimonial age like I did. It’s not like I purposely wanted to get married older but that is when God sent me my husband. You can plan what you want but God often has other ideas. Even if God sent me a baby now I just need to accept the joys and sufferings of that evern if it meant I or the baby wouldn’t survive the pregnancy.
I’m with you—I thought I’d be married right out of college and start my family in my twenties… but God’s plan was different and I didn’t meet my husband until I was 30. Since I’ve never doubted for a moment he was the right one for me I figured my “revised” family must also be a part of God’s plan. His plan also included law school and a second (I consider motherhood my primary vocation) vocation as an attorney. It’s actually worked out well—my ability to work from home (and abroad) at my “leisure” and still be a full-time stay-at-home mom. I guess He really does know best!
I am 43. I have 12 children and would love another. My last two at 39 and 41 were hard mainly due to being born in August and September. Due to wearing support hose often, summer pregnancys are tough. I have lost all my baby weight for the first time in 22 years and look forward to starting thinner with a new pregnancy if God blesses us again.
I had my sixth child at 39 - healthy baby, great pregnancy (except sciatica, typical of all previous pregnancies!) But at 41, I miscarried twins and during the last sonogram it was strongly suggested that I get genetic testing. The doctor was cold and unsympathetic when he gave me the stats regarding advanced maternal age and birth defects. I don’t remember much of what he said, just his condescending tone! Thank God for Dr. B at Tepeyac, who gently helped me through the loss.
I had my last at 40, although I suffered a miscarried at 42. I found my last two pregnancies at 38 and 40 to be easier than all of my previous pregnancies in my 20s. Because I learned with age that I needed to take care of myself, I gained less weight and bounced back quicker than I did with my other pregnancies. I think that I only gained 23 pounds with my fifth child. What this experience has also taught me is that because I still have little boys running around, I need to continue to take care of myself. Not sure if I would have been as diligent ( I certainly wouldn’t have been running after small children and keeping in shape as much) if I wouldn’t have had them.
I have three friends that are expecting. They are: 43, 45, and 47 and the comments that they get is unbelivable. I think that our society is less tolerant of older pregnancies because they have embraced a contraceptive and individualistic mentality that screams, ‘Your child bearing years should be over and you should start focusing on yourself!” With better prenatal care and longer life spans, it’s a shame that our society can’t see the beauty in what is truly natural and God-given.
I had a wonderful ob. I remember going in—I had read all the books and paid attn to the all the doom and gloom—and he was so kind. He did mention we “could” do genetic testing(I was 34 at the time), and we thought, “Oh great, a bunch of tests”, but then he continued and said, “But all will give you is a bunch of stats that may or may not be confirmed—it is up to you; your history looks good on paper”. We did miscarry the first one. He was always so upbeat. Also, after #3, there was a 4yr difference between #3 and #4. During that time at my appts, he would say, “Soooo you ready for #4?” and we would laugh. I told him I knew the risks with my age and all. His response was pretty surprising—he told me he has been delivering babies from mom young and old and my age did not have the final say on anything. He said a lot of his older moms are smarter, they know what they want, done the research so they know how to take care of themselves and are always on time for the appts. So, we have 4 beautiful kiddos and they pretty much were easy preg and deliveries—all 4 c’s. Cord was wrapped around neck, breach, and I was fine with the c’s. For some reason, after each delivery, I was always like, “Okay, I could do this again”. After the 4th, I don’t have the yearning for another—IF I am blessed with another one, I will praise God and be thrilled. Don’t think I am going to be praying to have little ones at 70y-that’s a little advanced for me. HA. I do think if I had my kiddos when I was younger, I might have more energy and a bit more patience, but I am looking at two beautiful 15m eyes looking at me right now, and would not change it. I know this sounds a little like i am paying homage to an ob, but I know having a positive dr on hand helps.
This is something that has been weighing heavily on my mind, and it’s so nice to hear other people’s positive experiences. I have 4 children, the first one just before my 30th birthday and my youngest when I was 35. When I was 37 I had my first miscarriage. Now I am 38 and if I were to get pregnant today I would be 39 when the baby would be born. And I can’t help but thinking “I’m too old to do this again.” I know that emotionally I would be a better mom than I was at 29 but physically I just don’t know. I’m sooooo exhausted all.the.time. And now I would have a huge gap between my youngest and any baby that might be in our future. My husband is so good about putting it all in God’s hands, and me? Not so much. God bless all you mom’s out there!
Dealing with a chronic illness and over 40 tells me it would be extremely difficult to have another baby. Given that I manage day to day as it is it could possibly break me. Seeingmy sister starting and raising her family older as shown me it is harder for many moms to have babies in their 40’s. However, It is wonderful that some of you do and can do it well.
I had my first at 41, then my2nd at 43. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks, before both - something I call my “dress rehersal”. With my first I had gestational diabetes, breast fed for a year and lost all the baby weight plus, then wanting to conceive, I stopped breast feeding, gained 20 pounds and then conceived with #2. Because of the weight loss between pregnancies, surprisingly I did NOT have diabetes the second time, but I felt so much more like a whale with the second than the first!
My greatest sorrow in life is that I did not have more children, but I married late, and we agreed on 2. Being 60 when their 20 and 18 . . . . , 70 when they are 30 . . . . I’ve had to look at the other end of things. My parents are 30 and 40 years older than I am, and it is hard on my familyt to have aging, dependent parents. I don’t want to be a burden on my children.
The positive side of being a parent at any age, I think, is that you bring love into the world.
I Have 5 children here with me and 3 in heaven. My oldest is 21 my youngest 4 1/2. When I delivered my third child I was a very healthy 33 y/o. He was born with many health issues . At birth my husband and I were told he would be severely disabled if he survived at all. Of course this doom and gloom story began at our 20 week sonogram….the only prenatal test we did . My son is now a very healthy 15 y/o. He is completely healthy with above average intelligence and he is the most athletic child in our family!!!! He was in and out of hospitals until he was nearly 5 months old. He is my miracle child and the reason for my complete “reversion” in faith. After he was born I stopped trying to “plan ” our children and left my fertility in Gods hands . It is the best thing WE ever did for our marriage and life as Catholic parents. We had 2 more beautiful babies and sadly lost 2 . I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I cant say I would not be a little nervous about health issues if I were to become pregnant now at 48 but “my trust is in the Lord” He knows what the plan is. Oh…..my extended family and in laws think we are crazy too
I am 37 and have five kids. Every day I think about another baby but I also think about how depressed I got when I had to yank on support hose before I even got out of bed (during my last pregnancy). I am in the best shape of my life right now and sometimes I think that I just need to keep going with my fitness and sometimes I think this would be a good pregnancy because I am so fit. Do any of you ladies have advice for dealing with varicose veins during pregnancy? Would it help if I tried to keep my pregnancy weight down? Also, how can I have a serene older pregnancy? I don’t want to be up nights worrying that I’m taking on more than I can handle or that my baby is not healthy. I just don’t know how to turn that over to God in a concrete way.
I think for me my varicose veins were mainly hormonal. The support hose helped me so much. I can think of much worse things people go through during pregnancy. I get mine from this discount place: http://www.discountsurgical.com/details.asp?productid=21223. This is from an old post of mine. http://www.discountsurgical.com/details.asp?productid=21223.
Thy Will Be Done!!! +JMJ+
V.veins: yes, mega doses of vit.C helped immediately w/ the burning, aching and throbbing sensation (~2000mg—it’s all water soluble,so non-toxic)
Prescription, med. weight, thigh-high, toeless support hose. That was the key—not the full panel or w/covered toe.
Mine are most definitely genetic, and wonderfully permanent & hideous to behold, but pregnancy takes them to a whole new level of *wow*.
I also found that by withholding my water intake before bed & chewing gum instead during the last trimester, I could reduce my all night trips to the bathroom & also get the support hose on in bed in the morning w/o creating more *ahem* laundry for myself. Then I’d get up and chug as much water as I could right off the bat.
I conceived a week after my 40th birthday. We weren’t actively trying, but I suppose subconciously I knew someone was missing from our family. I guess we gave God “just enough” opportunity. (I also found out later the Paleo diet I was following for Crossfit increases my fertility, resolves fertility issues.)
I wrote about finding out I was pregnant on my blog:
http://soundmindandspirit.blogspot.com/2011/02/gods-call-is-sometimes-surprise.html
I was pretty distressed about it for a while, but I found a lot of relief in all the positive comments and encouragement from others. I want to say to Kim F. that next year you will be 39 with or without being pregnant. My older daughters have birthdays next month and will be 9 and 12! So this is a completely new “start-over” for us. I stressed a lot about the age difference, but I’ve heard from so many people who were the youngest, with 6-9 year gaps between their next older sibling. They reassured me they had a truly wonderful relationship with them.
Just this past Monday I wrote about all the humorous contradictions I’ve been hearing in my 7th month.
http://soundmindandspirit.blogspot.com/2011/07/pregnancy-contradictions.html
I’m one of those odd people who have never really enjoyed being pregnant and to be honest I don’t really remember much about the last pregnancy (at 32). I’m in much better physical shape this time. I started this pregnancy back at my college weight (I’d lost 25 lbs in the two years preceding my 40th birthday.) I worked out consistently until the 6th month and known I should be back in the gym, but life has been REALLY BUSY at work lately.
I can’t say I’ve done anything differently with this pregnancy. I cut back to half-caff coffee and I’m eating more (esp. ice cream after dinner) and I know I’ll pay for it later in the gym. With 10 weeks to go I’m starting to get… uncomfortable… but I’m also starting to get just a little bit excited about the idea of having a new baby.
You know your own body - if you want another baby, pray about it and put it in God’s hands. He knows His plans for you!
I have nine living children and ten in Heaven. One we lost at birth due to a birth defect when I was 37, another was at 20 weeks when I was forty, and 6 more miscarriages have occured after the age of 41 for me. I cried and cried and prayed and prayed for another baby and so did my living children. At 46, with three children in college and the other six still home being homeschooled, I have finally begun to realize the wisdom of God at hand in this stage of my life (and I do not say this easily, I have fought Him every step of the way on this!). Yes, if I became pregnant at my ripe old age I would be exultant but I, who loved every minute of being pregnant even when I was throwing up for the first four months every time, have begun to think that moms need to really approach pregnancy over forty with prayers for discernment. Taking three children to college (three different colleges) every year, picking them up for breaks, supporting them financially, emotionally, and most importantly, spiritually is very, very hard work. And if I really think about having a baby at 45 or 46 and realize I would be taking my last baby to college when I am in my sixties, I have to wonder at the fairness of this to me, my spouse, or the child. There is a point when the body needs rest and recuperation and, especially if you have had a large family, the body does some rebelling in the forties. Kind of like a car needing a whole lot of work after it reaches the 100,000 mile mark! My doctor has always teased me that I would want babies even when I am 80. I realize that he is right and I will always long for that probably until the day I die. There is nothing like a baby in the arms or at the breast or in the arms of his or her siblings. But I am finally coming around to realizing that what I want isn’t always what I need. I am glad that through many tears and prayer, God has allowed me to finally trust in His Wisdom for me. I will always congratulate any woman, whether 20 or 50+ pregnant or pushing a baby carriage. Yet I will continue to look for the beauty in accepting the natural limits of this stage in my life and look forward to the day when I can live eternally with all nineteen of my children and, hopefully, many grandchildren!
That was beautifully written. Thank you for sharing! I just had my fifth baby six weeks ago, and I am already “planning” my sixth. I have often wondered when the “baby urge” will go away, so the words hit me that it doesn’t necessarily go away, but you have to discern when that phase of your life is done.
Mason, it was so good to read your post. I was hoping for years to find someone who “was like me.” I married just shy of my 31st birthday but DID not want children due to the fact that I had a lousy childhood. My parents had seven children but harbored resentment towards us. I don’t think they wanted that many children. Sadly, I call it the BJPII syndrome. (Before John Paul II explained the Theology of the Body). Anyway, the grace of God intervened at the age of 38 and opened my heart to children. I had my first at 40 and my second at 42 almost 43. My second pregnancy was harder than my first because of having gestational diabetes and a little one to tow around. However, I would do it all over again. My greatest sorrow is that I did not have more children. I was really hoping to try for another at 43-44 but circumstances in our family life changed. (Both my parents died suddenly within 17 months of each other). I just wasn’t up to it. When I begin to feel sad about the regret of not having more children, I have to “take that thought into captivity” so as to not fall into despair and trust in God’s divine providence.
It also helps that my sister is a NICU nurse (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) and she tells my frequently “just be thankful you have two beautiful children—if only you saw what I saw everyday.” God is good.
Sarah, There is a gap between my 3rd and fourth of 5 years and 6 years between my 4th and 5th. As I said earlier my oldest is 21 and the baby is 4 1/2. All the kids love the baby and their 10 y/o sister. It is hard to be in different stages for some families. I have 2 in college and the baby in preschool with 2 in between . It keeps us busy. Facing the challenges of guiding young adults is clearly off set by raising a baby all over again…sheer joy…until he has a temper tantrum in the grocery store…..then it is just “here we go again” may I recommend Rachel Balduccis book “How do you tuck in a superhero” Humor is key!!! As for worrying…..pray, pray,pray!!! I too am not fond of pregnancy but truly love bringing home that baby. As for the varicose veins? I never had any but I have tried to keep in shape with regular exercise( cleaning all those bedrooms and bathrooms counts) and keeping my weight down.I gained almost 40 lbs with the last but am at the same weight as I was pre children today! God Bless!
I recently read somewhere (Fit Pregnancy maybe?) that 29 used to be considered an advanced maternal age!
Ladies, new pre-natal blood tests will be available by April 2012 from Sequenom which can tell from the mother’s blood if her baby has a genetic anomaly like Down syndrome, etc. Now the abortion rate for pre-natally diagnosed Down syndrome is 92%, but only mothers over 35 are being tested. This will produce a tragedy of disappearing babies with Down syndrome. I have a nine year old daughter with Ds and her playmates are being threatened by this new test, which may soon be routine.
Most babies with Down syndrome are born to younger moms, a statistic based on the fact that younger women have more babies.
Please be aware of the eugenic nature of this test; to eliminate less than perfect babies from our society. I am sure you beautiful ladies do not have one single child, regardless of abilities or diagnoses, whom you do not consider a gift from God.
I am the mom who posted above who has the son with birth defects. I just happened to read last night that a large number of children with his birth defect are aborted. So sad and senseless. To me, aborting one of these children is like finding an original Van Gogh painting in your attic, and then throwing it in the trash because you think it’s too much work to find a frame for it. People who abort these children have deprived themselves and society of something beautiful .
I was given a blood test that said something was “wrong” with my child at 32.
The OB sent me to genetic testing. Thank God I did not believe in abortion. He’s a perfect little miracle!
I just turned down all those tests after that. I don’t want to be “counseled” to get rid of my baby. You are so right “Mommy.”
My second child was born with Williams syndrome, a rare genetic disorder, when I was the advanced age of 28. I have always declined the pregnancy screenings, but the pressure is always on to have all kinds of tests done and see genetic counselors because I have a child born with a genetic defect. (I just had my fifth child.) Is it easy raising a child with special needs? Of course it isn’t! But it’s not easy raising any child! We just have different challenges. My Clare is such a joy and a gift from God. When I think of all the children aborted or discarded because of having a defect, it breaks my heart.
I am 28 years old and am pregnant with my 4th child. I am having a difficult time explaining clearly why I don’t want to be tested for any genetic disorders and sound intelligent. I get the shocked and how could I not want to be tested.
In addition, I don’t like any interventions. I understand being prepared if there is something wrong or the doctor being concerned, but it feels like a constant battle lately for me not to have any testing/physical exams (may it be routine or not). I am extremely aware of my choices and get the whole, “Well, it’s routine, we’ve always done this or that.” Also, I am told I am a first to not do something or “we’ve never had anyone like you before”. I am sad because I am young and can’t imagine the pressure of older pregnant mothers. How do you nicely decline and sound intelligent. I have my next apt. and all ready declined to be tested for any disorders. I am not looking forward to defending myself etc. No, I also I don’t have a huge choice in my docs right now :(
For some, these tests will be a little glimpse into what their baby needs. For others, an excuse to not have them…sad.
“Stating Clearly” : just be polite, but insist! If they really try to corner you, you could try what we said, which was: “You know Doctor, we know you are probably trying to help, but it really doesn’t matter what the tests show. We are already in love with our baby, and there isn’t anything that could ever change that….but thanks anyway” Then, repeat as necessary. Good luck
I believe that any age is a good one to have a child. After all, wasn’t Abraham’s wife, Sarah, at an “advanced maternal age”?? God knows what is best for us and will bless us with children as he sees fit.
My husband and I had to wait 7 years before we were blessed with children. I’m in my late 30’s now and have 2 boys and one baby in Heaven. If we’re blessed again at any age we’ll happily welcome the new soul into our lives.
Doctors have really begun to cooporate with the society of death that we’ve created for ourselves. Since abortion has become such an “easy” option, doctors tend to discourage families from welcoming a child with any physical or mental disabilities. This in turn causes then to discourage advanced age pregnancies because of the higher percentage of likelihood for birth defects and such. Children are a blessing in any form.
We have 6 children and I’m currently pregnant with #7. I’m 39 years old. Baby #6 was born when I was 36. I’ve not really seen much of a difference between the pregnancies. I’ve had to deal with gestational diabetes with the last pregnancy and we’re still waiting to see what this one will do, but so far so good. I was offered genetic counseling and testing and turned it all down. If the ultrasound points to a problem, I’ll discuss it further with the doctors.
I think you all are awesome, brave, and faithful! Congratulations to those of you who have conceived recently. I am turning 37 this year and I am open to more babies. I have three right now. I just haven’t been able to get pregnant. My 3 and half year old won’t stop breastfeeding at night and in the morning. I do have regular periods though. I wonder if the breastfeeding is preventing pregnancy. Any thought on that anyone?
There is even the possibility that no matter what all the tests say, your baby will be 100% healthy. It happened to us. After my 20wk ultrasound, when I was only 25, we were informed that there were abnormalities. We declined the amnio because of the risks of miscarriage. We were told that our child would definitely have some mental retardation and possibly other defects. We were looking at down syndrome or Edwards (trysomey 18). We were encourage to think about ‘termination’. Our son was born a week late, 100% healthy. If it had been someone else, they might have killed their healthy child. Now, I’m NOT saying it would have been ok had there been a problem. I’m just pointing out that the tests aren’t always right.
I have enjoyed reading the comments above, but I think we are being awfully hard on the OB/GYNs. Just because a doctor suggests genetic testing, or reviews the risks with an expectant mother does not automatically make them a part of the “culture of death.” I believe it is the doctor’s professional responsibility to go over the risks of pregnancy - not to convince someone to terminate a pregnancy, but just so they are aware of any potential complications. I want my doctor to be honest and forthright with me about the risks of a pregnancy, just as he/she would be honest about the risks of any other medical condition/treatment.
FWIW - my doctor suggested genetic testing for me, and I declined. He said that was fine, and I felt no pressure to have the testing done. However, he would not have pressured us into terminating a pregnancy had we gone through with the testing and found an abnormal result. He was very honest about the error rates and risks of the testing. I believe that being an informed patient is always good medicine.
I do know what you mean about not painting all OB’s and doctors with the same brush…
However… When we were told I was “advanced maternal age”, and should opt for so many tests, we declined. There has never been a doctor who told me about the benefits of pregnancy-only the risks. The thing that struck me was the way you mentioned:
<I want my doctor to be honest and forthright with me about the risks of a pregnancy, just as he/she would be honest about the risks of any other medical condition/treatment.> I’m sure you know what you meant, but I took it to mean that “pregnancy and risks along the same lines as Cancer and risks or diabetes and risks or some other disease”—-kind of like my medical team since the beginning. I believe that because pregnancy brings a little being to life, I feel like it should be in a different group than any other medical condition.
I have had babies at the age of: 31, 33, 35, 41 and 44. I “might” be expecting again, even as *old* as I am.
I’ll pray for all of you, if you’ll say a prayer for this OLD Momma!
I agree RE we are too hard on docs just because they recommend testing. If I could find out my child had a serious health issue before birth it would help me to prepare. Doctors usually state risks because they are used to getting sued—that is just the way it is
My last one (of 3) was born when I was 39. I was too tired to get out of bed the last week of pregnancy, but recovered super well. The hard part started when I stopped nursing at 41. After he weaned and my cycles resumed—I’m one of those women who have no menstrual cycles at all while nursing even once a day—I got dumped abruptly right into perimenopause. My metabolism slowed a lot & I gained weight like never before, sleep disruptions, and then extravagant bleeding every month. zoom!! A nasty shock.
I am the proud momma of half my family born after I turned 35! I had five babies before 35, and five after, my last one being born at 42. Like the poster above, our third was suspected of having trisomy 18 and was born 100% without anything wrong. He is now a strapping 16 year old. My pregnancies, and deliveries were easier in my later years because of all the help from my children. I was able to take naps when needed, and they would certainly help with the babies(because they wanted to) after they were born. God will never disappoint us when we are open to the call of life. Never be afraid to be open to having more children, even when we are having geriatric pregnancies.
These stories are all very encouraging. I am 42 and my husband and I have had 2 miscarriages. We are still ttc and it is taking forever. We are doing Napro Technology and while our overall health is better, we still long for a living baby! New hope comes from these stories and I have renewed my belief and faith that God does indeed want us to have a child, as I had doubted His will for us in this regards many times. Thanks again for the encouraging stories of older mothers. Please do pray for us too. Thanks.
Well as a ‘Grand, Grand Multipara’ ( ‘Grand’ =5 children….thus ‘Grand, Grand’ =10 children) who was in a ‘Geriatric Pregnancy’ (over 40) at the age of 45, soon -to-be 46…I can relate to the comments and article. Outrageous terms to say the least
My son, now aged 4, as I approach 50 very soon, is a great joy to all of us in our family! (Our oldest will be 28 next week.) I was more careful to rest more and exercised faithfully on the elliptical, bought especially for the occasion. I felt great throughout my pregnancy and had a long, back labor (usual for me)..but natural home birth all the same. The little ‘old’ ladies at church still always ask me if there is any ‘news’ of a pregnancy
My last baby (my 10th) was born a little over a year ago 5 days before my 45th birthday. I was 43 & 41 with the two before her, so it didn’t seem anything new to be having babies in my 40s. Like Mary L above, I was dubbed the “grand, grand multip” in the L&D room! I have not really had any major problems, other than a few varicose veins and separated abdominal muscles—which I consider my “badges” of honor . I did have problems with breastfeeding with my last two, which was a heartbreaker for me. My husband and I joke about being REALLY old when the baby will be out of college. But hey, at least we’ll never want for company. What’s so good about having babies in your late 30s and 40s? The world will never be the same without each one of ‘em. I’ll share one verse and refrain from the song my husband wrote after Lea was born (he was 48 and I was 45)—to the tune of Kenny Loggins’ “Danny’s Song”:
Little Lea’s bound to see a lot of love,
An occasional push and shove,
And the sun and the stars above.
I pray to God that He will bless
The seed that now is sown;
Pretty soon she’ll be grown.
Bet she’ll never be alone.
(Ref) And even though we got nine others,
Five sisters and four brothers,
Everyone will bring a ton of love;
And you are more than, in His eyes,
than all the earth, the seas and the skies,
And I’m so thankful that
You got to be alive,
Little Lea
The plus side to “advanced maternal age” is that I’d met my dear husband, and got to have HIM as the father of my kids. It’s hard to imagine sharing the parenting experience with the guys I chose to date in my twenties!
I have to say that at ages 32, 36 & 39, it was my first pregnancy and delivery was the most difficult. However, the second 2 were born in the summer and early fall…therefore, third trimester in a heat wave + varicose vein support hose = slightly freaking out…
Sometimes I think the timing/temperature/weather was more exhausting on me that the pregnancy itself. I’ll let you know, esp. if I happen to conceive (at 40) in the next few months & have a spring baby!
I’ll add my two cents. I married at 39 and got pregnant with my first at 40 and had my second at 42. I’m 47 right now, and thinking we are done. We were extremely blessed with two easy pregnancies, quick deliveries and healthy babies. My nurse called me Fertile Myrtle, because I got pregnant so quickly—Thanks NFP! The good thing about being a mom at advanced maternal age, and having relatively good insurance, is you are monitored more frequently, i.e., more sonograms and visits to hear heartbeats. That put our minds at ease. Quite frankly I am so sorry we went to a genetic counselor. She sucked the joy out of our second pregnancy with all the doom and gloom statistics. Being older has given me more patience with my little ones—although I sure could use more! They are the joy of my and their Daddy’s life. One piece of advice. If you can, have at least two very close together. A sibling is the very best gift you can give your child. Cliche, I know, but I see it more and more every day. Oh, in my case the 2nd came a lot quicker than the first, so have that bag packed and ready!
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