Buying for Baby
Posted by Danielle Bean in Homemaking on Wednesday, July 23, 2008 2:50 PM
A reader writes:
“I am 6 1/2 months pregnant with my first baby. This little girl is going to be the first grandchild on my side of the family and my parents are very happy and ready to buy EVERYTHING for their new and first granddaughter. I’m also excited about buying stuff, and yesterday we bought the bedding for the crib and we’ll paint the room and buy the furniture in the next couple of months.
But I feel guilty. There are children in this world that only have one pair of shoes and one meal a day and here I am spending $200 on a bedding set for a crib.
My question is—what do you think is acceptable? Should I feel guilty because my baby will have a lot of material things while other poor little babies don’t? I don’t want to be of this world, I want to be of God’s world and be an example of non-attachment to material things with my family also.”
I won’t try to tell you how much is reasonable to spend on baby bedding, because the answer to that question will be different for everyone, depending upon their circumstances.
But I will tell you that we are not all called to be hermits. Motherly instincts compel us to prepare material things for our babies, even before they are born. “Nesting” in the final stages of pregnancy is all about securing material goods, cleaning house, and getting our physical surroundings ready to meet a baby’s physical needs. This is a good, God-given instinct and so it feels perfectly natural to prepare “nice” things for a baby’s arrival.
Of course we must be careful to find a balance, though. It’s not wrong to buy things beyond what is strictly “necessary” but you are right to note the value of maintaining a healthy detachment from material things. Personally speaking, becoming a mother has given me a great big push in the direction of healthy detachment. Something about the preciousness of our children’s bodies and souls makes “stuff” pale by comparison. And if that doesn’t do the trick, a 3-year-old who decorates your dining set with a Sharpie just might.
Since you have the means to buy nice things for your baby and yet are concerned about others’ inability to do the same, perhaps you should consider some acts of charity. When you buy some special item for your baby, you could buy an extra one and donate it to a crisis pregnancy center or give it as a gift to someone you know who could use it. Alternatively, you might consider making a cash donation to a baby-oriented charity in thanksgiving for your own pregnancy and financial security.
In the end, I think the fact that you are even thinking about these things is a sign that you are on the right track toward achieving balance. I wish you all joy in the adventure that lies ahead—you are a thoughtful and generous mother already.
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