Print Blog
Email a FriendI guess when it comes down to it, I do the same thing. Though, since my husband and I have some tastes that are different, the kids get to be exposed to a wider variety. Try as I might I do NOT like asparagus - but my husband does. I’m happy to know that all three girls have tried it, and one of them likes the veggie. She is the same daughter who will join me when the food is “extra” spicy - which my husband doesn’t like! I do have some strong little personalities who will speak up when they have a preference that I might not have picked for them - “I want a PINK dress” or “I want a NON-FICTION book”.
And, because of my daughters’ Chinese heritage, I have broadend my horizons when it comes to food and cultural activities.
Though I do see my mom’s influence in some of my choices around the home, I can definitely see that there was a point that I ventured beyond her tastes and I am still introducing my mom to foods - I can’t believe she never had hummus before!
Choosing Favorites
Posted by Rachel Balducci in Family on Thursday, June 02, 2011 10:31 PM
_1893-300x459.jpg)
I have noticed something lately, a funny little detail about being a mom and running the show and making lots of choices. Here it is: when it comes to making decisions, I choose what I like best.
That probably sounds like a no brainer, but it has occurred to me lately that I might be inadvertently training my children to have the same yens as me. When I reach for the yogurt at the grocery store, I choose the flavors I like. I pass over the banana and peach (those are good on their own, not in yogurt!) and opt for strawberry and blueberry. When it’s time to get fresh fruit, I do the same. I grab the fruits I prefer—apples, oranges, bananas—and avoid the things I’m not wild about.
When it comes to a whole host of other household decisions, it’s the same thing. I choose shampoo scents that I like, and reach for towels, hats, and pool toys that have colors that appeal to me. My home is more or less filled with stuff I like in colors, flavors and textures that I prefer.
There is a degree of this that is a no-brainer—duh, you might be saying. Of course!
But there is also something a little funny about it. Am I training my children to be like me, to eat foods that I like because those are the foods I bring into our home? It’s not even that I’m a picky eater, but I definitely have my preferences, and that’s exactly that I’m offering my kids. Isabel gets baby food in flavors that don’t freak me out (rhubarb? Nah.). Henry gets t-shirts in colors I prefer.
Somewhere along the way, I’m sure my kids will break out and discover that they prefer banana milkshakes to chocolate (but I sincerely hope this is never the case!). Until then, I suppose I will continue to offer them only what I consider to be good enough for myself, and I think there is some kind of sociological study behind this. Wouldn’t you agree?
Comments
Page 1 of 1 pages
I do that too! I notice it the most at the grocery store as well. I have to really work hard to buy foods that my husband and kids like. It’s hard to justify the expense of some of the things they like (steak, go-gurts, etc.), whereas when I am standing in front of the bean burgers or the Fage - things I like, I am able to easily justify buying them. It pained me today to put steak in my cart…$5/pound? Is that really necessary?! Yes, because DH likes them. Ouch.
I have to remember that just b/c I am the one who does the shopping, doesn’t mean the only foods in my house are ones that I alone like!
I would check into buying a quarter or half a cow this fall. You’ll save a lot of money on steaks.
Yes! I need to buy the light beer for my husband! Sometimes it’s hard to do- because no one else drinks it but him! On the other hand… it makes him happy that I’m thinking about him.
This is so true, I was in college before I ever tried an egg, and was shocked that I do like eggs, I always said I didn’t. The fact was my Mom can’t stand eggs, or even the smell of eggs, so we never had them growing up. Now my four children eat them all the time. it makes me wonder what they think they don’t like because I have never offered it to them…
I remember when I met my husband and he and his family introduced me to so many things that I didn’t have exposure to growing up. I had a father who would not try new things (once when I served zucchini with dinner he got upset because I was trying to make him eat something new!). I mean, we grew up with canned green beans or peas as a vege at dinner- hardly ever anything else! So my mother did not try new things or venture out at all. My family ate meat and potatoes with a little macaroni thrown in now and then! My mom did not like cheese, so we never had anything other than American on a sandwhich. I remember going to a neighbor’s house and they had Swiss cheese—which smelled horrible to me. I didn’t know such a thing existed (I was probably 7 or 8)!
It was like a new world to me when I met my husband’s family! Avocados, artichokes, ribs and sauerkraut, red onions (not just yellow anymore), vidalia onions, cheddar cheese, jello for dinner (that was always dessert in my house!), greens other than iceberg ...all things I love now and for sure feed my kids, who do have their preferences now of what they like or don’t like.
It is amazing how our preferences will affect our children. I noticed, too, when my sister and I dress our children- it’s obvious we have different styles when it comes to clothing.
I guess our kids are stuck with us and our preferences but I do try to expose them to a lot more than I was exposed to just to help round out their experiences.
I grew up with a similiar menu. my grandmother (may she rest in peace) was not a very good cook and certainly not an adventurous one. We were a meat and potatoes family. The only seasonings she owned were salt, pepper and italian seasoning. Old El Paso taco kits were the closest thing to ‘ethnic’ food we ever had.
I didn’t even have Chinese or Mexican until I was a teen. Japanese, Indian, Thai, Vietnamese, Greek…all those great cuisines of the world waited until I met my husband. My kids love curry and hummus and baklava and so many wonderful foods that I never even heard of until I was in my 20’s. I have a couple hold-outs that would love it if we had nothing but burgers and pizza from now until eternity but quite a few of them would rather eat curry than pizza and caesar salad over a burger \o/
I was thinking of this yesterday as I worked outside and ran frantically away from a wasp (which was in no way out to get me - I just have a serious fear of all things stinging!). I realized that although I have tried for years to get over this out-of-proportion fear of bees, I really need to work on it now before my toddler picks it up as well. I’m sure he’ll see me freaking out as the bees arrive this summer and wonder why, wonder if he should do the same. So sometimes I feel the need to deliberately work on my preferences/attitudes/behaviors so that I don’t pass them on!
When it comes to picking out items that my family doesn’t already have a taste for then I pick what I like. My children have never had a lima bean :D
I do take into consideration what my husband likes, always have and now that I have children that are old enough to have experienced foods outside our home and have their own preferences I try to take those into account too. Actually, the older I get, the longer I’ve been married and the older the children get (and multiply) the less and less do I buy what I’d like but subjugate to what the masses (ie husband and children) like.
One of the benefits of being a mother is that you can make all these decisions and run the show. I don’t worry about stunting my family’s taste buds. My family has plenty of opportunities out of the house (at school, sleepaway camp, restaurants, friend’s homes, traveling) to try new foods. I don’t sweat it.
I guess I do this too. Though I have to say that because my kids are mine through adoption and already came to me with certain preferences, I do try to honor them. Like the fact that they all LOVE shrimp (I’m allergic) and other types of fish (I can’t stand fish in general), but I buy it occasionally because I know it’s good for them and that they like it. The truth is, I am a picky eater, so I really can’t get my knickers in a twist about what my kids will or won’t eat. I love peach yogurt, they don’t. I try to honor that, but really, I am the Mama and that gives me certain executive orders. 
Same here but as others have said, some of the kids have their fathers taste, like mushrooms. BUT my now 14 yr old has her own opinion about clothes and what she will wear and the kids love movies that I don’t like. (I don’t mean bad movies, just corny ones.)
I heard recently that I could give my baby a little bit of spices in his food so he doesn’t grow up being so picky about spicy foods like the other children. I want to try it.
My kids are lucky here because at least when it comes to food I have always bought a very wide variety of foods. Because there is almost no food I don’t like I don’t descriminate. However, I do insist on healthy eating and we do have some food allergies so that puts some limits on what we eat. I hope that my kids will continue the healthy eating habits when they are older and continue to eat a variety of foods.
When it comes to clothes of course when they were little I picked out what I liked since me husband had no preferences about what they wore. Now that they are older they can pick what they want as long as it’s appropriate, modest and within the budget.
I honestly don’t think my kids even know what I like in foods and clothes.
Post a Comment
By submitting this form, you give Faith And Family Magazine permission to publish this comment. Comments will be published at our discretion, and may be edited for clarity and length. For best formatting, please limit your response to one paragraph and don't hit "enter" to force line breaks.
