Amen!  Years ago I gave up the chore chart and allowance.  Now I just assign a job that needs to be done (that minute) to whomever happens to be around, or lying around watching tv, or playing video games, or annoying a sibling.  It works like a charm.

We found a system that works for us a few years ago - we have 5 kids and it was a 5 week schedule (one weekly chore, one dinner time chore, one Saturday chore) per kid and put it on a spreadsheet (my son actually did this).    Now that my oldest is in college, we did a new 4 week schedule with jobs still rotating once a week.  When he came home for the summer, we fllipped back to the 5 week one.  We always know whose week it is to dry dishes, whose to set table etc.  If someone is gone for dinner, I have the option of changing the chore to someone else who is there, or doing it myself.  As they get older, they get more added on to whatever that job might be - as they get older, for example, cleaning the bathroom also involves cleaning the tub, not just the sink and toilet.  I agree that it has to work for whatever suits your family the best.  One thing I have noticed, is that I should actually be expecting my children to do more as they all get older.    Every couple of months we do some big chore (spreading mulch, or cleaning out our sunroom) and everyone is expected to help even though it is “off the chart”.    Also, my older children could be helping a lot more with dinner preparation especially during the summer.    We only pay $3 per week if all chores are done, but we do pay extra for big chores like cutting the grass.  Our kids actually “fight” over who gets to cut the grass because they get $15 for that.  We do have a big yard.  That seems like a lot to me, but my husband is the one that set that rate!    I think the main thing is that kids should be expected to help around the house and however you can get that done, go for it!

I have tried all sorts of chore chart variations.  Like you, Rachel, some things just don’t work well for me.  I had a “kitchen helper” but my kitchen is small so having a helper around while prepping meals or cleaning up, doesn’t help.  I also found that some kids were not motivated to do their chores for money or privileges because they didn’t like their chore.  Now, I have each kid’s name on a chart.  Every time I ask them to do something, or if they volunteer to clean something, I put a star next to their name.  X number of stars = X amount of cash at the end of the week.  For my kiddos who really want something at the store, well, this provides them with a way to earn the money and I get things done.  Sometimes nothing gets done and I just have to put everybody to work for zero reward but “because we are family and this is what families do.”  But most weeks, I have at least two of my four earning some cold, hard cash.

We have been using the same system for 2 years with our 2 older boys, 9 and 6 years old.  I stuggled with finding how to limit video/computer time effectively and consistently. So….. we decided no video games or computer games during the school week at all.  Our children earn their video/computer time by completing their daily chores.  For our 9 year old that includes emptying the dishwasher, taking out all the trash to the outside can, making his bed, getting ready for school in the morning without hassle, completing homework and prayers (for each of these they get 5 min) then they must also read 20-30 min for which they get rewarded min for min.  (I was having trouble getting them motivated to read).  For the 6 year old the chores are the same except he does the recycles and vacuums the living room and entry area rugs instead of trash and dishwasher.  This has worked beautifully!  They often compete for who can get the most minutes each week.  Usually they earn about 2 hours total for weekend video game time. 
Our 2 year old daughter doesn’t have a formal chart yet but helps without hassle (imagine that- the difference between boys and girls!) with picking up toys, putting away laundry, bringing laundry to the laundry room and putting away silverware.  Never hurts to strat early!

I totally get where you are coming from Rachel.  I have spent hours creating charts that never get used or just don’t fit our needs.  Thanks for the advice to fit our chores to our family not the other way around.

We’ve used all sorts of chore charts and finally figured something out that worked really well for us.  We have 7 kids ages 3-16 and they all have some chores.  I generally re-assign jobs in June and keep the kids on those jobs for the entire year (gives me the summer to “train them in” before homeschooling starts in the fall).  By keeping them on the same job both they and I know who did or did not do their job - no looking on a chart to see whose day is what, etc. (but…I do have them each take a turn helping a day with dinner so I can sort of train them in on making a complete meal, and they do take turns for dinner clean-up).
I am a firm believer (have learned the hard way) that chores are not optional.  So, I only assign the littlest ones chores I will actually make them do.  Our 3 year old simply straightens shoes once a day by matching them up and lining them against the wall.
Our oldest is also a challenge due to time constraints.  However, my dh grew up with a wonderful mom who decided he was busy enough with school,etc. he shouldn’t have to do anything other than study.  My dh insists our oldest are NOT raised this way.  Chores help teach balance and helping the family.  There have been studies that point out that people who have a hard time holding a job have a higher incidence of doing no chores growing up.  So, depending on what is going on with our oldest she may have to help clean up after dinner on the nights she is home, or she cleans a bathroom over the weekend, etc.  Our oldest does NOT spend as much time on chores as her younger siblings.  (and we pay a weekly allowance loosely based on how much they help - so my 10-14 year olds all make more than my 16 yo and younger set).  But, I figure if she has an hour a day to blog, email, chat with friends before heading home from school, read for pleasure (yes a good thing: ) then it’s not too much to ask her to spend 15 minutes or so helping us out with something.  When she is literally running ragged (she stared PSEO college classes during her senior year of high school 2 weeks BEFORE he nanny job ended) she will help when she can and she hasn’t complained.  So, while I don’t expect her to work hard on stuff all day and then stay up or skip homework to do chores, she can do something…even folding a load of towels…something to help her help us.
Now we moved and my old system that worked for years needs reforming…so I’m anxiously reading these comments   I am trying to assign by days (my 6,8,10, and 12 yo’s take turns emptying the dishwasher,etc.)  we’ll see how it goes. I am also finding that my oldest two boys are having to help my dh a lot more with some major jobs fixing things, etc. that can easily take an entire Saturday.  So, I am telling the others they need to pick up the slack.  Kinda wrong to expect those boys to sweat all day and then come in a sweep the floors and vacuum when everyone else is done in an hour or less
Also, another thing that has worked for us and we will continue to do is set aside Saturday morning (or some evening) for cleaning the house - and they all have assigned jobs so the hard workers get rewarded by earlier free time and not have to pick up the slack of the dilly dalliers.  Then on Monday nights they focus on their rooms.  Then Wed. night we have family movie night and if someone didn’t get their room done decently by then they clean instead of taking part in the movie.

Nice information here in this article.  It is important to have structure in the home an developing a system that works for you.  In our home we have a routine that we do every morning.  We also incorporate, the pledge of Allegiance and morning prayers.  Great information. Keepup the good work!  I would like to see men writing and commenting more on the daily aspects of the home because they should be involved in the schooling and especially in charge of the home as far as making sure the chores and things are done.  God Bless! Ave Maria!

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