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Posted by Arwen Mosher in Just me on Monday, April 26, 2010 2:32 PM
Whenever I hear someone talking about “girls’ night out” I get a wistful pang.
For a social person like me, the idea of party time sans children is very appealing. I’m not talking wild partying here. A tea party would be plenty wild enough for me, as long as I had something to sip and good conversation with my friends and I didn’t have to wipe a nose or change a diaper the whole time. Unfortunately, that kind of social interaction is not currently a reality in my life.
Is it a reality for most Catholic moms with young children? Based on my experiences in my own circle, I’m guessing not.
It’s easy to see why: the logistics of time away from the kids are difficult to coordinate. If a mom is already exhausted and desperate for a date night with her husband, fitting in time alone with her friends is not a priority and it doesn’t happen, especially if her friends are in similar situations.
I don’t feel deprived. My pals and I set up playdates during the day and make good use of the phone. I get plenty of contact with them.
On the other hand, last week I went out for an evening of shopping with my sister and was surprised how rejuvenated I felt afterward. I don’t even particularly like shopping, I just really enjoyed the girl time. Perhaps I - and my family by extension - would benefit from my having a small amount of “girl time” on a regular basis.
I know every person has unique needs; many introverts feel stressed rather than invigorated by the idea of an evening out. And every person’s situation is different; for many a “girls’ night out” would be nearly impossible or not worth the necessary sacrifices.
But maybe there are some of you who, like me, would love it and could do it, but just haven’t made it happen.
Maybe there are others of you who do actually enjoy regular social time with your friends.
I want to be one of those, but I’m not sure exactly how to do it. Make occasional plans with friends who are available at the time? Start some sort of regularly-meeting social group? Join a club related to an activity I enjoy? I don’t know, but I think I am going to figure something out. Currently I have an increasingly independent toddler and no baby, so the time is ripe.
What’s your experience in regard to social time? Is there a gap between your ideal and your reality? Do you have any tips or good ideas on the topic?
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Women work hard and should be able to play hard. Whether women are single or married, with children or without children, women deserve some time to themselves. These girls night out ideas are not for the faint of heart.
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