I’ve never worn a veil myself. I like the look of chapel veils and would consider wearing one, but there are a couple of “alternative looks” that rub me the wrong way. Cowboy bandannas hastily tied on seem to make women look more like washer-women than reverent pray-ers. Ditto the paper doily, napkin or tissue pinned on when a woman accustomed to veiling forgot hers. I find it hard to believe God would rather she put a tissue (or toilet paper—yes, I’ve seen it done) on her head than go bare-headed. These are silly cases, and the veils and bandannas on the site you recommend are lovely! I guess my point is that as with anything, veiling can be taken to ridiculous extremes.

Does wearing one of those pretty, wide-banded headbands “count” as veiling? I’d totally be up for that, since it would be pretty unobtrusive. No one in my parish wears a veil, so I’d feel silly in a full-on mantilla, but a thick headband would be great!

I wear one at the Latin Mass, but not regularly. First, and I could be wrong, but it is more of a tradition than a Tradition and scriptural. I think in 1 Cor. it states that our hair is our covering. So my understanding is that I don’t need one. I already stand out with our 6 kids and that we homeschool, and are very conservative, etc. I just could not stand it to have more people looking at me for yet another reason. Vanity, sinful, probably. But I am just not ready to do that, and in all honesty, do not feel convicted to do so. But more kudos to those who do!

When I was little, my mother and I wore veils to church until the early 1970s—basically little lace doilies pinned to our heads.  We were both glad to let go of that tradition, and I personally have no desire to go back.  The head coverings on the Garlands of Grace website are a totally different breed—if I saw a woman wearing one of those at Mass I don’t think I would even make the connection with veiling.  A lot of them look like basic kerchiefs or headbands, fashion accessories suitable for lots of occasions, religious and secular.

I really love the headband like ones at Garlands of Grace.  I’m a cantor and am not supposed to wear anything that ‘makes a statement’ while cantoring, so those would be perfect for me. 

Thanks for the link.

Head coverings (mostly in the form of scarves versus mantillas) are quite common in the Eastern Catholic Churches, older & younger women alike.  The difficulty that arises is when you have a little one on your lap or shoulder who is prone to tugging on & pulling off your head covering!

I have never seen anyone wear a veil to Mass, other than a bride.  So, no I wouldn’t.  It seems to me that this is a cultural issue, not a religious one.  If everyone wore a veil, I would.  I wouldn’t do it for any other reason.  Incidentally, the only people I ever see on a regular basis who cover their heads are Orthodox Jewish women.

Ha!  Yet another sign that the Holy Spirit is prompting me in this direction   I’ve held off for the same reasons.  Not sure how it would be received in our parish.  But I’ve been longing for one when we go to visit a nearby parish, when I go to Adoration, etc.

Hello Betsy,

The reason that The Church recommends veiling is for reasons of modesty. Veiling is an extra step of modesty when approaching the sacred mysteries (see the 1917 code of cannon law 1262, section 2). Wearing a veil specifically is a tradition but it is perfectly acceptable to wear a hat or scarf as long as it isn’t going to distract others (meaning it is not obnoxiously big or strange). The concept of modesty is tied directly to Paul’s quote. Not only do we want to be modest in front of Christ, but we want to help our Christian brothers not be distracted by our beauty. It is therefore spiritually beneficial to men and women. I posted below on the spiritual benefits that I personally receive from veiling.

Veiling fell outside of the mainstream around the time of Vatican II, although it was never said that women shouldn’t veil. In my personal opinion, veiling got thrown out in the zeitgeist of second wave feminism and the sexual revolution. Instead of being understood for its beautiful spiritual benefits, it was seen as women’s oppression. I, and all of the women I know who cover their heads for Mass, have found it to be exactly the opposite.

In Christ,
Heather

I have been wearing a veil for over a year now.  I simply wanted a way to show reverence for the Blessed Sacrament.  I completely understand women who are unsure of the reaction they would get; I didn’t get up the nerve until we got a new pastor who was encouraging of head coverings for women. 

I have found that veiling myself (and my daughter) brings more reverence on the part of myself as well as those around us.  It helps my daughter to understand Mass as a very special time.  On a practical note, it also helps when you are trying to pray after Mass and people tend to come up to you to talk.

Here is an excellent article on this topic:

http://catholicknight.blogspot.com/2007/12/chapel-veil-veiling-or-head-covering.html

I would also recommend that if you are going to start wearing a veil and you are married, talk to your husband first.  Make sure he understands why, as he may be asked what his wife is doing.

As far as what is allowed - anything that covers your head.  A veil, a scarf, a hat, etc.  I did once read that it was traditional for unmarried women to wear white/ivory and for married women to wear black when it comes to veils, but it doesn’t really matter.  I buy my veils from http://www.modestyveils.com/.

This post is somewhat of a confirmation for me, as I have considered wearing the veil on and off for about a year and a half now. (I went to my first EF Mass a year and a half ago, Corpus Christi 2008, and have attended about a dozen times since then.) This Tuesday, when I went to an OF Mass on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, I felt a definite tug towards wearing a veil to OF Masses as well, so I wore one to an OF Mass on Wednesday. I’m still turning a lot of the objections raised in this letter over in my head, but I think, all in all, the post helped me to reconsider some of the areas where I’ve been hesitant, and it has encouraged me to continue to wear the veil. Overall, I’m wearing the veil as a sign of respect for the Lord, and I hope that from wearing it, the external action will help me to form the inner virtue (i.e. wearing the veil will help me to be truly pure and humble of heart).

This is a great topic I have pulled toward wearing a veil for almost 5 years know. A friend of mine started (we do not live close) I wanted to but then we moved to an area that has a large poulation ofSt Pius the X society people and when people do not understand why they thik you are one of them and to Holy i guess so i have not done it altought I have wanted to. We also have a very very small parish. But after this post I plan to start wearing one and have found the most beautiful ways to explain why. Thanks so much

I had many of these same thoughts and then I came across an article that helped me decide what I needed to do:

http://www.4marks.com/articles/details.html?article_id=2077

This subject has been on my mind lately, but I’m in the same boat as a lot of other ladies. I’ve never seen a veiled woman in Mass, so I wouldn’t even know how to do it or what type of covering to choose. I’m also with those who are nervous they are attracted to the veils because of how pretty the coverings are!

I wore one for about a year when I was 17.  It was very nice but it was sometimes hard for others to understand why I did it. Now I think that my teenagers would be totally uncomfortable. +JMJ+

My husband and I have discussed veiling extensively. After I went through all the long arguments and why I did not think it appropriate, my husband simply pointed out what (so far as we know) is the most recent direction from the Vatican. In Inter Insigniores the CDF said that veiling no longer has a normative value. Thus our understanding is that covering one’s head for mass is only desirable if there is some some cultural context which makes it appreciated.

I cover my head when attending a Latin mass at a very traditional parish, but for me to veil without the impetus coming from culture would be for me to be making up rules for myself not provided my my Church, and that is a very dangerous situation for my temperament!

I think that it is great for women to follow God in every way they believe themselves called, but this isn’t a calling for me in a cultural context which provides no value for the action.

I was expecting to find the head coverings at the website to be like the one in the photo above, so I was very disappointed. I might wear some of those around home but I’d NEVER be caught dead out in public let alone church with them on! Talk about drawing attention to yourself! My 23 yr. old daughter would be mortified and refuse to be seen with me! If the head coverings were like the one in the photo, I might wear one as it is pretty.

I started veiling about a year ago. I was inspired to do so after attending a traditional Mass and doing more research on the topic. I will admit I don’t veil all the time. I don’t veil if I am the only one taking my son to Mass. My husband is military and sometimes I am on my own for Mass. If so there is no point wearing a veil because the baby just pulls the veil off. I find that it becomes a distraction for others.

I am also feeling a nudge in that direction as well. It is easy to do when the prevailing culture endorses it, and you are not the center of attention that way. 

I had no problems when I lived in Asia (Japan and Korea) or when living in Germany, but back home in the US of A, “it’s not done.” So of course, if you do, you draw attention.

I’m thinking that with it being winter, and bitterly cold, wearing a hat to church, and keeping it on, would not be a stretch.  There used to be very pretty hats years ago almost everywhere, and in some places, still available.

Maybe trying that way, use the winter season to ease into it.

I started to wear a veil to Mass and in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament about 2 1/2 years ago, but I’d wanted to wear a covering of some sort for about ten years—long before I even considered becoming Catholic!

While I was still an evangelical pastor’s wife, I started studying what God desired of a woman and came to understand I Cor. 11 to be taken as instruction for all time, not just the time of St. Paul.  However, since it was not my husband’s conviction, I did not wear one as I see a definite issue with a woman wearing a veil in disobedience to her husband when one aspect of it is to signify our acceptance of God’s ordained order.  So, I often wore a veil I made myself just during private prayer.

When I came to study the Catholic Church and, eventually, to be convinced of its truth, all of a sudden the significance of the veil overwhelmed me!  Veiling in the very Presence of God is a very different thing than just covering out of obedience!  Our step to becoming Catholic was a big one and my husband was still not ready for me to stand out so much from others while we adjusted to the change.

When he finally gave me permission to veil it took me awhile to actually take the step—it is hard at first to stand out.  However, after the first month, no one paid much attention and, I must say, it has helped me tremendously in my devotion during Mass.

The veil is not only a spiritual symbol and a sacramental (therefore a means of grace), but a practical way to block out distractions.  That’s one reason why I wear a mantilla-style veil rather than a hat, band, scarf or something else.  Not only do I want to be clear about my intentions (I’m not a stylish person, so to all of a sudden start wearing something on my head would have been puzzling to people), but it allows me privacy because it drapes my face on the sides when I bow my head.

Two of my three daughters also veil, each being given one when they receive their First Holy Communion.  They love them too!  My youngest looks forward to when she receives her veil.

I think the idea of a “Wear your veil to Mass” day would be great!  Even if you would be the only on in your parish, at least you’d know you weren’t alone!  And, yes, it is an opportunity to grow in humility for there will always be those who misunderstand or call you “pre-Vatican II.”  But most often when someone says something to me, it’s a compliment or even a “thank you.”

I started covering my head at Mass when I started going occasionally to Extraordinary Form Masses; I assumed that if I didn’t I’d get glared at, or offered a mantilla from a communal box, or something. Then I realized - hey, the Ordinary Form is no less (or more, of course) Mass than the Extraordinary Form, and when I’m covering my head I’m more conscious that I’m not just a spectator, I’m here doing something special.

As for *what* I wear, I bought a long scarf and I wrap it around my head. (It doesn’t look like a turban or a hijab, I assure you; I don’t have any pictures of myself in it, though.) Partly that’s because I don’t want to look like I’m mimicking the older Hispanic ladies in the parish or like I’m making a statement about What Women Should Be Doing, which is what it’d feel like I was doing if I wore a mantilla.

My comment ran a little long, so I turned it into an entry - lol

http://justnotgrey.wordpress.com/2009/12/12/the-veil/

I have been “haunted” by the verses in I Cor, and was never able to get a decent answer as to why God would suddenly decide that in the 1960s, women didn’t have to cover anymore. I know that we’re not obligated to do so now, but still… well, I just couldn’t shake it.

And I wasn’t really happy about that, because I had no desire to be stared at. I’ve got 7 kids under the age of 12, so I was already getting enough stares as it was! *grin*

My option was to just start wearing a hat. I wear one every Sunday, and usually whenever I go into the chapel for prayer with our homeschooling group. When I forget, then I have to whip out my grandmother’s mantilla (which I keep in my purse), but let me tell you, I get so embarrassed and self-conscious I just want to crawl under the pew and cry.

I feel like a wimp… I mean, seriously, people are dying for their Faith, and I can’t slap a piece of lace over my head without “dying” of embarrassment? That speaks rather poorly of me, I must say.

I would jump for joy if other women started wearing a veil… then I wouldn’t feel so out of place. But, I keep reminding myself, “maybe someone else is waiting for another woman to go first, so why not let it be you?”

All I can say is my spirit feels unsettled when I don’t cover at Mass. My hat seems to work OK for now. I don’t feel any more “spiritual” or “holy,” but I do feel like I’m doing what I’m supposed to do.

After looking at the offerings at “Garlands of Grace” I am puzzled.  What makes these any different from a simple scarf or headband?  I do not know what is considered an appropriate head covering for mass. Can someone explain this to me?  Is a simple hat appropriate?  Are there any guidelines?

I have been veiling for almost 2 years now.  I never realized that I might be coming off as holier-than-thou and if I have to anyone, I apologize profusely!  I also am terrified of drawing attention to myself so here was my solution.  I found a plain black triangle scarf in a nice, formal material.  Since I have very dark hair, it is somewhat difficult to see from far away.  No one has ever commented on it (to my face) and my 10-month old has never tried to pull it off.  Here is a link to Patrick Madrid’s blog post where he discusses veiling briefly: http://patrickmadrid.blogspot.com/2008/12/veil-wars.html

Just to add interest—I once attended the installation of a family friend as a deacon in a black independent Baptist church.  The rather lengthy special music was provided by the gospel choir from a big-city sister church, and all the women were veiled!  Small lacy doily types mostly, and in black, which made them unobtrusive on the also-very-dark hair.  But enough variety to make it clear they were individual and not part of the “uniform” choir-robe ensemble.  I imagine it’s a bit of localized Biblical literalism; none of the female members of our friend’s congregation veil, though many of the older ones still wear hats.

Oh I love the snoods! I’m tempted to get one just to wear around the house.

Over the past few years I’ve read quite a few articles and blog posts on the topic of veiling. (The Anchoress had a really good discussion: here and here). Ive read enough good defenses of the practice of wearing head covering at Mass to make it seem attractive as a spiritual and devotional practice. But so far nothing has convicted me that I need to wear a veil myself. The only time I’ve worn a mantilla to Mass was on my wedding day.

I do worry that were I to begin covering my head it might become a source of pride and vanity. (Exactly the opposite of the effect it’s meant to have to show humility and obedience before God.) Part of the attraction for me is one of style and a sort of romanticism. (See wearing a snood around the house.) So I fear I would find the practice of wearing a veil or head covering actually was a distraction during prayer and a temptation to the sin of judging others. I already struggle with this issue of judging what other people at mass are wearing. I know it’s petty and a very bad habit and I fear wearing head covering might just exacerbate my problem.
I wish it would become normative for the Church again and then I could veil without any internal struggle. It would simply become a mater of obedience and I wouldn’t stand out for doing it but would just be one of the crowd. I know some people claim it should be normative and we should be veilig already as a matter of obedience but until it actually is something that everyone in my parish does, the temptation would still be there for me.

Also, this is a secondary issue but not unimportant, my husband isn’t really behind it and feel I should follow his lead.

Thanks for opening up the discussion and for the link. I’m going to go back and drool some more.

I do cover my head at church, and I belong to a parish where this is common (our priests are diocesan priests who only say the extraordinary form, and have for many years). Being in an environment where this is the norm happily negates any pride issues that might come up. Previously, when I attended a Novus Ordo parish, I would sometimes cover, sometimes not. I understand that tension and feeling like it’s unbearable to be sticking out so much. Now when I attend the NO I still cover up because it has become an important and meaningful symbol to me—if ever I am at a parish where I feel like I would be openly stared at or rudely asked about it, I sometimes go without it for a few minutes, telling myself it’s not necessary, only to cover up 20 minutes in anyway. Doing so always gives me a tremendous sense of peace. It helps that my fiancé is usually with me in these situations; he and I both know what it’s about, and I am able to focus on Our Lord in the tabernacle—I know that He also knows what it’s about. I would like to see all women wearing head coverings, but there are sociological problems (vanity, judging, etc.) with it coming “from below”; I would ideally like to see the veiling of women made the rule by pastors and bishops.

I’m not sure what to think of this. I think this defeats the whole purpose of veiling. If you are supposed to veil so as to appear more modest and not call attention to yourself, wearing a pretty veil only makes other people look at you more. Back in the day when all women wore veils, it made sense, but now I just don’t see the point. Unless everyone wore one, it would not make a difference. I think it is more important to veil the heart, although I can see how for some people veiling can be seen as an outward sign of an inner disposition. Nevertheless, if veiling is equated with fashion, I am not sure that I want in on it.

I know that prompting feeling—it’s what hit me 17 years ago and when I spoke to our pastor he encouraged me to follow to it. I have worn a veil at mass on and off for the past 17 years with the last 8 years being consistently on.  You get used to it, people who know you get used to seeing you in it and it ceases to draw attention.  On the rare occasion I have forgotten to bring my veil with me I don’t wear anything and trust that the Lord knows my heart . . .but it feels strange. My girls (I have 3) all wear veils too.  They want to and they know they don’t have to Yes one is a teenager).  My husband is very supportive of it and I am happy to see more and more women veiling in the last few years.  We attend both the OF and EF of the Mass and I veil at both.