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Email a FriendHeart-wrenching. BBeautifully written, but what a tragedy. Such a sad & sobering reminder for us to have a broader and better perspective on the problems that trouble our days. And yet the mother’s last lines gave me pause: “Parenting, I’ve come to understand, is about loving my child today. Now. In fact, for any parent, anywhere, that’s all there is.” As Christians, our belief in the resurrection reminds us that in fact, today is not all there is. There is so much more, and as foreign or mysterious as that may seem, it changes everything about how we live here and now.
In This Moment
a beautiful parenting perspective
Posted by Rachel Balducci in Family on Monday, October 17, 2011 1:33 PM
This essay in the New York Times took my breath away. It is heartbreaking and lovely and inspiring. It reminds me about what’s important—this moment—in the midst of all we strive for in our roles as parents.
Our parenting plans, our lists, the advice I read before Ronan’s birth make little sense now. No matter what we do for Ronan — choose organic or non-organic food; cloth diapers or disposable; attachment parenting or sleep training — he will die. All the decisions that once mattered so much, don’t.
Comments
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Posted by Patricia on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 2:39 PM (EDT):
Heart-breaking, indeed. How fortunate this precious little boy is for being born into a family that will love him for however brief his life may be here on earth. With the advent of prenatal testing, many children with chromosomal abnormalities are not so fortunate. May his family find peace in Jesus Christ. I pray that they have him baptized.
Posted by Kallie on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 2:58 PM (EDT):
I was so thankful for that too, although - was I the only one wondering about her reference to being tested for Tay-Sachs *twice,* or did I misread? I couldn’t help but fear if that test had caught the disease in utero, she might have acted on that information and never given herself the chance to love her precious boy. :(
Posted by Patricia on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 3:09 PM (EDT):
Yes, I noticed that, too & was saddened by the thought of the love this mother would have missed had she decided to abort her child if she had tested positive for Tay-Sachs disease. We have no idea the opportunities for love that are lost with SO MANY children with special needs being aborted.
Posted by Patricia on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 6:00 PM (EDT):
No jumping to a conclusion intended…which is why my wording stated “the love this mother would have missed had she decided to abort her child.” Some prenatal tests can allow parents to better prepare for the surgery, special care, unique medical needs their child may encounter after birth. Thanks be to God that, despite the pain they will endure, these parents have an opportunity to love & be loved by their precious son.
Posted by KC on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 2:55 PM (EDT):
Thank you for linking to this, Rachel. I think it’s an excellent reminder of both the fact that we need to make the most of today and the fact that our children will die, as will we, and we need to, in this “moment” of today, try to remember that our goal is to spend eternity together—and live like it. God be with this family and all those with terminally ill children.
Posted by RE on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 4:53 PM (EDT):
I agree with Melissa Z. Sometimes on this site, I think we are so eager to show everyone how pro-life we are, that we assume the worst about everyone else. Some women choose to have prenatal testing so that they are aware of all the problems their children may have, not necessarily to abort the child. The way I read the article, she included the face that she was tested twice for Tay-Sachs, to show the readers that no matter what, life itself is very uncertain.
Posted by Kallie on Monday, Oct 17, 2011 5:12 PM (EDT):
That’s very fair. My reading was more due to the fact that this was in the New York Times (site of so much pro-abortion cheerleading, including the one on selective reduction of twin pregnancies just a few weeks ago). I just had an uneasy feeling when I read that sentence. But of course people do have prenatal testing done for many reasons - I completely understand that.
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