28 years ago, my older sister (she was 16 at the time) gave birth to a baby girl. This birth turned her life (& the lives of the rest of our family) around.  My niece is now married & has 2 small children of her own.  After my niece’s birth, my sister quickly matured & began to take her Faith very seriously.  The issue of abortion took on a whole new meaning for our family as we immediately fell in love with this tiny baby who, considering the circumstances, might have been lost to abortion.  My sister’s growing involvement in the pro-life movement drew my whole family in, renewing our Faith in the process.  In a sense, a teen-aged girl & a newborn baby are responsible for my family’s strong Catholic Faith.  My sister is my best friend & my inspiration.

The biggest female influence in my life was St. Therese the Little Flower but if we are talking living women only there were a bunch including my godmother, my confirmation sponsor, my best friend growing up, a couple teachers, and my current best friend.  All were holy, intelligent, and successful in their jobs (whether that was student, wife, mother, or career woman).  It’s funny but I can’t even think of one influential woman in my life who wasn’t a devout Catholic.

Spiritual motherhood to me means that,as a woman, I have responsibilities and duties to care for all people I come in contact with, whether it’s a smile, a kind word, or offering my prayers (this isn’t to say that I always do this, but it’s a good goal to have:)  We have to try to build people up by our words and actions, not bring people down by them.  I try to remember that part of the definition of justice is to see all people as God’s children and therefore treat them as such.  I’ve been fortunate to witness some of the Sisters of Life (the joy they have) and the Little Sisters of the Poor, who kindly take care of the elderly.  There’s a woman in my parish, who is a giant in my eyes, and it’s because of her humility and her dependence on prayer; her hope, even during dark times, is inspirational.  And of course, there is Our Lady-my biggest role model of all.

When I read Story of a Family about St. Therese’s family of origin, her mother, Blessed Zelie Martin, was a true inspiration for me.  But, I’m noticing other moms citing women in their own lives, and maybe that’s how it really is supposed to be.  I agree with one of the ideas you brought up, Rebecca.  As wives and mothers, most of us are called to a life that is a sort of hidden heroism.  We are called to support and even mentor other women, but most of us are not called to be known beyond that.  God may call one of us to witness to the church on a grand scale like St. Gianna, but I think it’s part of the nature of our vocations to, like you said, focus on the relationships with those around us.

Besides our own personal role models of living relatives, etc. If you you mean wide known Lay Saints for women the first one of course our Blessed Mother.  Next one that comes to mind for me is St. Elizabeth Ann Seton (although she became a nun later), Saint Monica, and St. Gianna Beretta Molla.  And they were all physical mothers too.  Doctor of the church Saint Catherine of Sienna was also a laywoman. Hope that helps!

HI Anne

I suspect that many nuns get canonised because they have the full force of a religious order behind them to promote the cause for canonisatin. I get cranky when I think of people like Mathew Talbot who are still waiting and deserve the full thing. There are many lay women who attain holiness and do it despite of great obstacles but I doubt if being a nun is a cloistered or open order was easy either. The older I get, the more I realise life for most people is a hard road and all have their own problems, or crosses. Sr Faustina spoke of how she found some of her fellow nuns hard to bear as lay people do and everyone’s lives have such people and irritations and challenges. Heroic virtue belongs to lay people as much as religious people.

My Mom was my role model.  She stayed at home and raised us kids, and even though we had little money, she always found ways to make us treats and make life fun. Her faith was so important to her, and she and my Dad raised all of us to attend Mass and go to confession.  But more than that, I never, ever saw her turn away anyone in need.  As I said, we did not have much, but whatever we had, she and my Dad were always willing to share. 
My Mom passed away 16 years ago, and I miss her so much.  But I truly believe she is a saint in heaven.  During the summer she died, she had entered the hospital.  At the same time she was dying, my youngest son, Jacob, was critically ill.  The doctors had said he would probably not live, and if he did, he would be severely mentally impaired. My Mom had been so worried about him…he had so much wrong with him and the doctors could not seem to help.  Before she died, my Mom wrote a note down on a piece of paper (she could no longer speak due to the breathing tubes, etc)  She wrote, “take Jacob to a neurologist”.
That was only a few days before she died.  I pushed Jacobs doctor to refer him to a neurologist, and he finally did.  I prayed to my Mom everyday and asked her to help Jacob be healed.  He was.  It was a difficult process, but Jacob is now 16, a straight A student in honors classes…andand full of faith.

St. Gianna is a wonderful example for our times. Wife, mother, physician. Born not much earlier than my own mother. Her letters to her husband are beautiful, and her children (youngest) is only a few years older than me. She has become a great inspiration to our family and an example that holiness is a choice.

I have never met Danielle Bean, Rebecca Teti, Rachel Balducci, Karen Edmiston, Elizabeth Foss, Suzanne Temple…but sometimes when I’m here in my own little corner of the world and I’m feeling a bit like a lone ranger trying to do the right thing and live a joyful life in my vocation as wife and mother those women inspire me.  I read or think about something I’ve read of theirs, and I think “I bet Elizabeth Foss would not be pouty and angry right now”...well, maybe she would for a second, but she would not live there.  She would probably…___ and I’m inspired to get out of the doldrums I’m in and carry on.  Spiritual motherhood to me means inspiring, teaching and influencing another to desire the good, the holy, and the pure.  To desire God.  The women mentioned above all do that for me.  Thank you!

An excellent role model for lay women is Venerable Elisabeth LeSeur of France, a French lay woman credited with the conversion of her husband from atheist to priest. You can her writings in “The Secret Diary of Elisabeth LeSeur” and “Light in the Darkness: How to Bring Christ to the Souls You Meet Each Day”.  Both are great books for highlighting holiness of the married lay woman.

Anne,
My role model is an amazing woman named Margaret Stender. She is a home schooling (soon to be Catholic schooling) mom who has lived her faith in a quiet but powerful way.  Her example as a firm but kind parent, loving and supportive wife, dedicated and inspirational friend is what I think about when I am feeling a little in the dumps.  She feels and loves deeply, but trusts completely that God has her best interest in mind no how difficult the situation.  I have never heard her speak an unkind word about anyone and she has the ability to lead a group of women to see the good in everything God wills for us.  She is active in her church community , but in a way that enriches her family without subtracting from it.  She doesn’t live a fairy tale life and she readily admits that love can mean suffering and sacrifice and that parenting is not always pretty on the outside - like the back of the tapestry.
Will she ever be canonized?  Not sure, but that doesn’t make her any less holy.

I think I understand what Rebecca is asking.  Unfortunately, the most prominent Catholic women politicians in this country are pro-choice and otherwise support anti-family (and anti-Catholic) policies.  A lot of the prominent, pro-family women in public life that I admire are not Catholic.  It is hard to think of someone “personally admirable and widely enough known that she could be called a role model.”  (I can think of plenty of lay men, however.)  But as for “widely known” in the Catholic blogosphere, I do admire women like Danielle and Rachel (and other Catholic bloggers) for their love of life and confidence in living out their faith.  They just don’t happen to be people my non-Catholic friends would ever have heard of

We must truly understand the value of a single soul.  I am blessed to have a group of holy Catholic sisters that are my greatest living feminine influences.  The “world” looks for famous heroes.  Who can live up to the glare?  As the spiritual world is so much larger than the physical world, spiritual motherhood, though often unseen, is a great gift.  I find the great saints very inspirational but my sisters in Christ who live quiet, heroic, strongly spiritual lives are often more inspirational. They witness to me the love of each person with whom they come into contact, not because it will be noticed, but out of love of Christ.  In a world where the mighty often fall in a big way, perhaps there is much to be gained by lifting one another up in our littleness, by looking for the good and loving part of each soul with whom we come into contact.  We may be called to correct wrongs in charity but always in relying on God’s goodness and divine mercy to light the way.  A delicate sense of surrender to God and reliance on His strength in our part to carry out His will are essential. God loves each of us with great delicacy; I see this reflected in my holy friends.  Humility, charity, mercy and complete surrender to the will of God; to me these define the role of spiritual motherhood.  May we all spend time first with God in order to be filled with His graces, pray for His divine intercession, surrender to His will, then act for the good of each individual whom He brings to us.  To exist always in the conscious presence of God and seek His will over ours is the goal of spiritual mothers. Our sphere of influence may be small in the estimation of the world but may our light dispel the darkness and our love move heaven and earth!

How about the Servant of God, Catherine de Hueck Doherty — apostle of the poor, author, & foundress of the Madonna House Apostolate?  I have been very moved by her writings, in particular Strannik: The Call to the Pilgrimage of the Heart, Bogoroditza: She Who Gave Birth to God, & Poustinia: Encountering God in Silence, Solitude & Prayer.

My husband’s sweet, strong and intelligent grandmother died last month.  As a Catholic wife and mother of 8, she has been a great inspiration to me.  Thirteen years ago, as I wandered around her house on Christmas day looking for a private place to nurse my first newborn baby, I accidentally ran across her bathing her 50 year old son who suffered from severe Down’s Syndrome.  She was 89 years old.

Rebecca, this is a great topic!
I don’t think role models need to be famous or well known.  In fact that usually means there is a distance and that can mean that we look at that example and expect we could never live that life.  I look at Mother Teresa and am so glad that I’m not called to that type of holiness, but I’m glad for her example.  But that holiness looks unnatainable from where I sit.
When I’m looking for a role model that I can truly emulate I look at the women who surrounded me when I converted to the Church.  These women adopted me spiritually and ensured that I was being fed.  I think it is too easy to flounder in your faith if you don’t have this type of mentoring.  I have continued to be blessed with women who are living their faith the best they can and are happy to help me live mine.  There is one family in particular that has pulled me in and kept me close.  They are so loving and are such a great example. 
As far as “celebrity” catholics as role models: Janet Smith for her ability to explain/defend the faith; Kimberly Hahn to explain what being open to life really entails; Leila Lawler has especially been kind in nurturing my faith and helping me be a Catholic mom; Elizabeth Foss has helped me to be more loving and gentle; Suzanne Temple, Danielle Bean, Rachel Balducci, Margaret Berns, Rebecca Teti, Michelle Reitmeyer, and others have shared their lives so honestly and with such humour on their blogs. Even the sad things that they might share helps me grow as a mother and a woman. It makes me feel a solidarity as I try to live my life in my own little corner of the world. Sometimes, because I live in the country(our closest neighbour is 1mile away) and we homeschool I feel so alone in this life and I’m so grateful for these women so generously sharing their lives with me.  Although I may never meet them in Real Life they help me to feel part of the Body of Christ.

Great topic, Rebecca. I will keep thinking of lay women role models, but in the meantime I wanted to say that I loved this:

“...your most profound and fulfilling achievements will come at the level of relationship: the way you see, nurture and call forth the goodness in others.”

This is so, so true. I actually think that this is one of the most valuable things women bring to the paid workplace. Some of the best professional mentors I’ve had have been women—and they’ve been the best because of their ability to do exactly this. Thank you for articulating it so well!

My mother-in-law.  She now has Alzheimer’s disease and rarely responds to anyone around her but she is/was a great role model for me.  She raised 11 children in the faith and went to mass daily and confession monthly.  She knew what was important in life.  Nothing was more important than her belief in God and living accordingly.  When I ever feel a bit overwhelmed I often think of her as a vital, strong woman of faith who was never afraid to stand up for what she believed and had the courage to go against the secular popular beliefs of today. She is/was a rock of faith.  It hurts to see her changed so much by Alzheimer’s disease.

I have a friend from college who I look up to. She is someone who has really just listened for God and has let herself be led by the Holy Spirit. The trademark of her life is just joy. It is real and draws you in! 

I think she was such an important example in college because she was faithful but also very fun: she started a Catholic Studies Group and also participated in Euchre tourneys, she prayed Christian prayer and played volleyball. . . aggressively. lol. To me she was (is) an example of a well balanced, happy Christian enjoying God’s world, in the right way. 

Now she’s a mother of three young children and I look to her example not to be too serious or get too anxious about parenthood.  She is so practical and prayerful!  So thank you for helping me reflect on the good women in my life and offering up a prayer for a very faithful woman that has inspired a lot of people already in her short but dynamic life.

I’m a mom of 10. For me spiritual motherhood has meant “adopting” one who is not my own and praying for him as St.Monica for St.Augustine.

This is a late response as I was away last week and am just catching up.  There is a pediatrician at Children’s Hospital in Boston named Claire McCarthy who writes on the hospital’s blog and contributes to one of the major parenting magazines (I forget which one).  I have never met her personally, but always admire her writing.  I don’t know a lot about her faith and beliefs, but feel that she is a great role model as a respected professional mom with a large family.  I’m sure that she has a really big impact on her many patients and readers.  Her blog can be found at childrenshospital.org.