My daughters are 13 and 17, and they both have MP3 players. We allow them to listen to the music from musicals and movie soundtracks our family has enjoyed. (Cars, Enchanted) They can also hear selected Christian and Catholic music. They hear music at LifeTeen mass or LifeNights and will often want that, too. Recently, I allowed them to get Jonas Brothers and some Hannah Montana stuff, because they were interested, and I know it isn’t all they will listen to. I really like Here With Me Now by the Hands. We listened to that for years. They also listen to some of our old music (John Denver, James Taylor, Kenny Rogers, etc.)

My 13 year old son wants to listen almost exclusively to rock, and that’s hard now that we’re listening to it through the ears of parents.  So we pick and choose.  We won’t just hand over an entire CD, but selected songs, etc., from The Who, Zeppelin, Yes,  - fortunately he’s more into the music of the classic rock “sound” than the lyrics meant to make a mother cringe, and as of now he goes along with our decisions respectfully, so there is no real arguing.  Ooops, now I’ve jinxed myself .....

Although my teens do listen to the radio/CD player while doing the dishes (country, classical, children’s tunes) I prefer they only listen to classical music at other times, such as when they are studying. I feel that our culture has made popular music so accessible that it is so easy to tune out the voice of God trying to speak to them. If you browse through the Pottery Barn Teen catalog you will see ipod ready backpacks, chairs, beds, etc. A young person can virtually wake up in the morning and be listening to music until he/she goes to bed.
  Teens need lots of quiet to think about the things of life and be available to hear the voice of God talking to them in their souls. If the pattern is set that they must always have music surrounding them, how will they carve out this time when they go to college, and are afterward, living on their own.
  I also believe that music can and should (some of the time at least) raise their minds and hearts to God. Classical music, chant, etc. can do this. If they are fed a diet of popular tunes, how will they themselves choose this more beautiful music when they are grown? Just like taking them to daily mass and frequent confession, we lay the ground work and pattern for them to follow when they go off to college and enter adulthood. We must also make it a priority to do this with the media, music especially.
  Andrew Pudewa (The institute for Writing Excellence)has a good CD on the effects of music. Father Basil Nortz (The Work of the Holy Angels) has also put out a wonderful CD as well. I encourage all parents who are curious to listen to these tapes.
  My husband particularly dislikes ipods because they cut the listener off from the rest of the family. At least while listening to the radio, one can still have a conversation and our teens are still connected to what is going on in the rest of the family.

While I would love my children to listen to classical music, they hate it.  Forcing them to listen will only cause resentment.  My youngest (8) has a CD of “24 Catholic Songs for Children” which I found at OLVS.com. My 12 yr. old likes Hannah Montana and the Jonas Brothers.  She also went on a Eucharistic adoration weekend and discovered contemporary Christian music so she has gone through my collection and put a great deal of that on her MP3 player.  We have rules about what they can lidten to, and even the amount of time they spend listening to the MP3 players.

We have a couple ipods in our home and the whole family is wild about listening to music.  My eldest son has ADD and for him, listening to an Ipod is a life saver because it helps his brain filter out the noise and distraction of his 6 younger brothers and sisters.  We don’t find it a problem for our teens to be “plugged in” to their Ipods as we simply do not allow volumes that keep them from hearing Mom’s voice.    So in our family, we do not find Ipods to be divisive at all as mentioned in post 3.

One beautiful function we’ve had for our Ipods was having a Christmas music list and a “music to clean by” list that we plug into a stereo and blast for all to enjoy so additionally, Ipods are not necessarily solo entertainment around here.  (The music to clean by list is a lot of peppy music geared to keep us moving!)

My advice is to preview all lyrics before allowing the kids to add them to their playlist.  We let the kids choose music they enjoy within reason.  We are a much happier family now that music has filled our souls!  And our kids have an enjoyment and appreciation of a wide range of musical styles.  We do some of our best moral education and discussions when we listen to music of all kinds.  It’s amazing the deep conversations one can have with a teen about the subject of a country music song, for example.  It has been a real blessing to us!  To look at country music for a second ... there are a lot of really neat songs that emphasize family values, going to church/faith, stories about what happens when wrong choices are made.  There are some immoral songs in country music but not nearly as many there as in other popular forms (and as mentioned above, these songs have provided important opportunities to discuss relevant topics with our teens as they age in a non-threatening manner). 

All that said, here are my kids favorites:  Weird Al songs (ah yes, Mom does not approve all of his songs so preview!  They are a lot of fun though!), several country music artists (my kids like the more “pop” sounding country more than the twangy sounding country): Brad Paisley (many funny songs like I’m Still a Guy and Online), Taylor Swift, Rascal Flats, Kenny Chesney (be careful, about half of his songs are good, the other half not at all), Lonestar (Front Porch Lookin In, Mr Mom are priceless), Kari Underwood (Jesus Take the Wheel), Mark Wills (19 Something is one of my faves), Rodney Atkins (Going Through Hell and Watchin’ You are both great ones).  There are tons more but that gets you started.

My 14 and 17yo boys recently got into rock a little bit.  They like Chris Daughtry (first got into him during an American Idol season).  Natasha Beddingfield has a song I like (Pocketful of Sunshine).  But I will say this here and it goes for all music ... be very careful about music videos.  Most of them are impure so just because I would recommend certain artists/songs that is not necessarily an endorsement of the music video!

Okay and can’t forget some of my kids all time faves.  They ADORE a group called Libera which is an all boy choir from England who sing amazingly beautiful songs.  There is an awesome Catholic CD called “Hours” which is from one of the seminaries and one of our favorite priests (young orthodox on fire for God) was involved in that one.  Another one is from Mount St. Mary’s Seminary called Vespers Schola which has another of our fave seminarians in it. 

Don’t forget music from other countries/other traditional styles.  Green Man has Irish type music.  In fact, a teen friend of my kids is super into traditional Irish music which is a lot of fun to listen to.  They also like a lot of music from movies. 

I’m looking forward to seeing what other people recommend!

My kids love 80’s music—which is a plus.  My daughter also loves soundtracks—esp Wicked, Mamma Mia and Phantom of the Opera.
Jeremy Camp is great as is Casting Crowns.  Buy Ascent for your daughter—4 Catholic sisters with beautiful voices!
Matt Maher is another good one!

My two younger brothers (14 and 17) like music, but we the only thing we can agree on is Jack Johnson.  Love his music…

They should definitely check out "Catholic Rockers" (podcast)!  If they like Hip-Hop, then they should check out this episode of “The Perseverance Podcast”

I find it hard to get teens excited about listening to podcast over music, but then again, I was the same way when I was a teen myself.

We listen to a variety of country and pop - I try to screen out some.  We also listen to some contemp. Christian music - I love the Newsboys (just skip the concert!) Adoration and Go! albums.  John Angotti is a family favorite whom has come to our parish several times - very nice band, too!  My 10 and 12 yo girls love PureNRG - young teens singing about God in a very upbeat fashion.  We also have 2 by Catholic Kid’s Worship that we have given as gifts and the girls’s favorites.

When our teens were younger (say 12, 13ish) and were starting to have iPods, we were very aware of what they were listening to.  Before they had permission to load a song onto their iPod, they had to find the lyrics online and print them for me to review.  I also kept my ear low to the ground (stayed informed) about some of the artists/groups out there.  I did this a lot through reading “Plugged In” magazine put out by Focus on the Family (or reading their website http://www.pluggedinonline.com).  If the lyrics were objectionable I would discuss them with the kids and hopefully help them to learn to discern. 

The genre of music that our kids listen to varies from contemporary Christian, country, rock, classical, heavy metal (gag) for the four teens (18, 16, 15, 13) to pop music (Jonas Bros and Hannah Montana and that sort) for the 10 and 12 year old girls.  The three youngers still like “little kid music”. 

Really, a key thing we all need to do is know our teen.  Some have better discerning faculties than others, and some naturally want to really make sure the songs are not offensive while others don’t care as much as long as they “like the beat”.  Our oldest, a daughter who is now 18, had milder tastes and was a bit easier to guide than two brothers who have followed.  But all three older teens are at the point now where we trust their judgement and they pretty much put what they want on their iPods.  In my opinion, a real key to this is forming the kids to have good discernment skills regarding music, just like we’ve tried to do with movies.  They’ve gotten in to the habit of looking things up on Plugged in online before deciding if they should see a particular movie or explore a new music group (the movies are always still subject to our veto - way easier for me to stay on top of all the recent movie releases than music). 

I trust my older teens’ judgement enough now that in the library check out line, when my 12 year old brings the latest Kenny Chesney, Taylor Swift, etc CD to ask if she can check it out, I ask the older kids what they know about the artist or CD. 

Specific artists that the teens listen to range from Aerosmith, Nickelback, and Skillet to Tim McGraw, Trans Siberian Orchestra, TobyMac, Switchfoot, and SuperChick.  They also like all kinds of soundtracks, including from the animated movies they used to watch.

I’ll close with this funny moment:  Recently in the van when my 18 year old had a Meatloaf song in the CD player, we were discussing Meatloaf’s music from my day.  My 6 year old piped up from the back of the van and asked, “Who would name their kid Meatloaf?!”. From the mouths of babes…....

Our oldest dd12 listens to my old Cat Stevens’ Greatest hits CD, the Beatles’ Blue Album on CD, a Johnny Cash Childrens’ Songs CD, Cello music called Angels’ Dance…right now she loves the Amy Grant Christmas CD…

For the older kids who are past the little kid music I allow the following:

1. classical
2. folk/ethnic
3. Christian contemporary/rock
4. selected show tunes (Sound of Music, Les Miserables, yes; Phantom of the Opera, no, etc.)
5. selected songs from selected secular artists such as U2 (not many approved in this category)

My 2 youngest children (19 and 15) have ipods, as well as their older siblings.  Past the age of 21 I have no say as to what they listen to, they are adults.  The older one loves country music, as well as some “hard” rock, and the younger one listens to classic rock and roll.  It’s getting harder to scrutinize what they listen to as they get older, and I find that if we disallow “everything” (according to them!)  it only makes then more eager to listen to the “forbidden”.  So yes, over the years I have eased up a bit.  Their choices on the whole are good ones.  They are good kids!

I agree so much with Teresa (#10 post) ... it is such an important process for our teens to learn to discern.  Often, I find myself saying to my oldest ones (17 and 14), “You have been my child for many years.  You know what my standards are, what questions I ask, what research I do.  It isn’t possible for me to preview every show, every book, every song anymore.  And aside from that, I trust you.  Do *you* think I’d say it is okay?  And more than that, you have to form your own standards now.  Does this fit into *your* standards?”

I often find myself amazed by their discernment.  Sometimes their standards are more strict than mine!  It’s rare that I disagree ... and a disagreement leads to a discussion where we consider each other’s point of view and thus far I’ve been impressed by their decisions.

Plus, our kids aren’t just getting their information from us.  We live in an awesome diocese and the priests have done some great talks on these kinds of subjects during retreats or youth events.  So they aren’t just getting it at home.  That makes a huge difference!

My two teens love anything Matt Maher, Jenny Pixler, and Justin Graves.  They are all Catholic artists.

We go to spiritandsong.com and you can listen to a lot of song clips to find the genre you’re interested in before you commit to buying.  I know my daughter that attends high school hears enough secular music in carpool, so I encourage her to put Catholic/Christian music on her mp3 player.

My girls also enjoy songs from broadway musicals.

Celtic Woman, Anuna, soundtracks from Cars, Ella Enchanted, Enchanted, Star Wars, etc…Phantom of the Opera and other Broadway shows,  classical pieces, select country songs from Brad Paisley, George Strait, Taylor Swift….select rock-mostly older (since that is what dh and I own and are familiar with) from Boston, Journey, ELO, BeeGee’s, U2, Sting

How could I forget Wierd Al?!
My boys love Wierd Al. 

I see a lot of people gagging over rock, harder stuff but in our house it’s pretty much what we like. Maybe I don’t fit in but I figured I’d add my voice so if you are concerned you maybe able to check some Christian rock I’ll mention…. (We also like some an a capella group called Cantus. I recommend the album Let Every Voice Be Heard - really fun mix of different cultures - and my son has discovered John Williams soundtracks)

I really want to recommend Flyleaf. They are Christian rock and very good.  We’ve branched to a couple of good Christian rock bands - skillet and rise against. I would say Rise Against sounds pretty angry. In the song we listened to they are angry about injustice and poverty.

And a friend recommended Five Iron Frenzy - which has some ska and is fun, though they are not together any more.

We’ve loved Rich Mullins songs. Still do. Despite our rock-ness.

Up until Christmas I had complete control over our downloads. My money, my account.

But at Christmas she got two gift certificates and I let her create her own account, which I have access to. She downloaded a few songs I was not thrilled with - Hot and Cold by Katy Perry and some Fall Out Boy and Tokio Hotel. Very popular stuff.

One song, she discovered, even though it didn’t have “explicit” on it, did have curse words. She deleted it herself. I’m proud of her for that.

I really discourage anything about sex or even “love” for young teens. I had to complain to my kids public school when a gym teacher used Soulja Boy’s Crank Dat. It was the PG version but the words are just bleeped out and the message is horrible.

And for podcasts - Fr. Roderick on SQPN - Daily Breakfast is great.

My 14 year old son got an iPod last year for his 13th birthday. I pre-loaded songs on it, ones I knew he liked. Many are 1980s songs (my generation), Weird Al, some songs from Dr. Demento CDs, some of the classical music from Star Wars soundtracks (and other soundtracks of movies he likes). He has some POD and some DC Talk (Jesus Freak, What if I Stumble?), some selections from a Disney dance CD (with a lot of 80s and 90s dance songs—YMCA, le Freak, Everybody Dance Now, etc.).

Lisa wrote: I really discourage anything about sex or even “love” for young teens. I had to complain to my kids public school when a gym teacher used Soulja Boy’s Crank Dat. It was the PG version but the words are just bleeped out and the message is horrible.

Oh! That song is AWFUL. They played that at our son’s elementary school talent show and I wrote the principal an e-mail that night with the lyrics. Not sure kids actually “get” what that says, but why normalize it for them in their innocence?

I’m going to hold on to these ideas for my littles, until we break down and buy an Ipod…..maybe when they are 30????

Maybe we should have gotten ipods earlier for our teens.  By the time they got theirs, they were in their late teens, bought their own, were way more computer savvy than me, and not so easy to monitor, and I honestly don’t know what my 18yo senior in highschool listens too.  It is no mystery to him what our standards are and we’d ask him time and again, ‘you are only listening to music in this house that we would ok, right? I am music illiterate and have never had any interest in it either so we came into the preteen and teen years a bit unprepared for this subject.  Our eldest went from Christian Rock to classic rock and then to heavy metal by the time he graduated from highschool-in hindsight I see much of it was VERY anti-Christian, and pagan if not worse, and I have to say, I contribute his music over the years to slowly eroding his faith to the point that he is now an angry atheist at 20yo.  And now I have a 14yo who desperately wants to buy Guitar Hero or Rock Band and I am AFRAID.  He wants music with some beat to it and wants, well I don’t know exactly.  He doesn’t have an ipod and has just listened to the radio I guess, but I recently heard some awful stuff on our radio station and was reminded again - no radio, at least certain stations-mostly the ones he’d like.

We do listen to classical music in the car and around the house but I’d be lying if I said the children love it so very much that is all they want to hear and therefore have no desire to listen to rock.

My teens are 13, 15, 17, & 19. The 15 and 19 yo have i-pods but I do restrict their use as they do need to unplug now and then to socialize with the world around them.

Because they do have a decent foundation in classical music they do have a taste for good music. (I try to make it enjoyable and not force it down their throats). However, they also want “teen” music.

So, they listen to Christian rock. We listen more to the Christian rock station lately than the classical station in the car, but I still prefer “light” music in my house.

At the teen blog, noquestionleftbehind.blogspot.com, I have some Christian rock links in the sidebar. We also run a music YouTube video every Saturday (click on the Label YouTube in the sidbar). Checking those two things out will help you see what Christian rock is available and whether or not it is for your family.

There are a ton of Christian rock videos under favorites here:
http://www.youtube.com/user/NoQuestionLeftBehind

Anon,  Your sons are in my prayers.  I’m sure your 14 year old wants the Guitar Hero® or Rock Band®, but there is an alternative called Guitar Praise (similar to Guitar Hero or Rock Band) is now available for the Computer!  It features some of the best Christian Rock bands out right now.  I posted more about it on our blog (see link below).

http://catholictechtips.stblogs.com/2008/12/03/addicted-to-guitar-hero-or-rock-band/

Hope this helps : )