I have a six year old girl who is ordinarily a very sweet child. But, on occasion, she kind of gets “cranky.” She rarely hits but she will take toys away roughly from her two year old brother or push him away and, consequently, down. Her words can be mean and ugly, too. I punish accordingly, i.e. first, apologize nicely, then time out in her room and/or “grounding” (meaning no outside play which she covets daily). I usually know that when she acts like this it’s because she is in need of some one on one mommy time. All of my kids (even the 14 yr old!) needs time alone with me or at least my undivided attention for a short period of time. When they start acting up, I know I need to plan a few hours with them but sometimes for immediate relief, I occupy the others and sit with the “needy” child and color or craft or just chat while I work. My six year old loves to help dry dishes or flip the laundry from washer to dryer. This is her time to talk to me about everything that’s important to her. I would definitely talk to your daughter and tell her that hitting hurts and that your family policy is a no hitting one. And even though she probably won’t know why, it wouldn’t hurt to ask her why she hit her little sister. Sometimes six year olds can have surprising insights into their own actions. She may have learned it from t.v. or a school friend who himself saw it on t.v. in a comic fashion and relayed it differently. The possibilities are numerous. But don’t dwell on it too much or judge her harshly. It’s probably an isolated incident. Show her more effective ways of expressing her anger and encourage her to talk to you about it. Good luck! (So much for showing the love on St. Valentine’s Day, huh? LOL)

I have a 6 year old boy and it amazes me how cruel he can be to his 4 year old brother while being wonderfully sweet to his almost 2 year old brother. And yes, it almost always has something do with the four year old not following his orders. Really hoping that seven is the “age of reason” and that this passes soon for you and me both!

Awesome!  Thank you!

If you don’t have a kindle, you can download kindle for pc (free!) or a kindle app for your smartphone. Thanks for letting us know about the book!

If you have access to a Napro Technology doctor, that would be my first step. The only time I had a hormonal imbalance (progesterone), my doctor caught it as soon as I started describing the symptoms and put me on Prometrium, which began to help right away. I would think a blood test would be required to determine whether or not you do have a hormonal imbalance and to determine which hormones are causing problems, so I wouldn’t think self-treatment would be accurate. If you don’t have a Napro doctor close to you and if your current doctor refuses to order a blood test, I think I’d find a new doctor.

I think more women have hormone issues than even realize, and too many doctors just brush the problems off. If you truly think you have a hormone imbalance you should insist that your doctor does a hormone panal on you. (Sometimes they will do it twice dpending on where you are in your cycle to get a clear picture) If that doctor doesn’t listen to your concerns and act accordingly then you should seek a second opinion.

I speak from a lot of experience on this issue. Many women in my family have had issues from hormone issues during pregnancy to hormone problems later in life. Just know that it’s not normal to have the symptoms that you are having. Too often people just claim that goes along with hormone swings, but that’s not true. Something can be done to help you. Good luck!

I found out about my hormone imbalance about a year and a half ago when I attended a Creighton Model introduction course.  The instructor was going over the “abnormal” cycles at the end of the class and said that if you had premenstrual spotting, you likely have low progesterone which can manifest itself in many ways, one of which is horrible PMS.  I just knew she was talking about me.  I had been having premenstrual spotting for many years and was always told it was normal or, like you, offered the BCP.  I believe that another symptom of low progesterone can be post cycle brown bleeding.  I was referred to a NaPro Doctor by my Creighton instructor.  It is sort of a long process.  I had to chart for about three months to see a pattern before the Dr. would see me.  Then I had to get blood tests at certain points in my cycle according to my chart.  I was given   Prometrium after the tests came back low.  The Dr. also prescribed an anti-depressant.  He said that if the mood swings happen all the time, it’s likely to be depression.  If they happen before your period, then it could be hormone related.  I had both.  BTW, I was just referred to a new NaPro Dr. who determined that I have PCOS, which can contribute to depression and lots of other health issues (hypertension, diabetes, low progesterone).  There are meds to help with the PCOS too, which is a metabolic disorder.  Please forgive me for rambling, but I so want to help you because I feel your pain.  I was a complete mess, no patience with my husband or kids, yelling all the time.  It is worth it to get help if you have the symptoms.  Creighton instructors, please correct me if any of this info is incorrect.  God Bless you, Upsanddowns.  I’ll pray for you.

Have you had your thyroid and adrenal gland check?  I found out my adrenal gland was not functioning properly which caused a host of health problems. I had many of the same symptoms as you.
  Check out http://www.stopthethyroidmadness.com
It even has a letter/list to take to your Doctor which describes the tests you need and why.  It is really helpful.  When I read the testimonials I felt like someone had a lense into my life!

Thank you all so much for your suggestions and support - it really means a lot to me! Now I know where to begin.

My cycles were like anon above. Premenstrual spotting and crazy PMS and an early miscarriage between my first two children due to low progesterone which clued us into starting to watch things. Taking prometrium has been the equivalent of anti-depressant for me. I only take it ten days a month, but what a difference. After my third child was weaned I had a couple of regular cycles, but then the symptoms started up again and this time I was able to just call it into my doctor and he put me right back on prometrium without any further tests.

Terrified of NFP wound be an understatement.  My husband and I have four children (two of them are 15 mths apart) and all were brought forth on a ‘clear’ day.  I totally get the anxiety that builds up even when sex is supposed to be a beautiful part of marriage.  My husband, while a huge supporter of the thought of NFP, wasn’t really that active of a participant in helping to keep track of things, trying to wait getting together when i wasn’t sure it was a good time, and interpreting the chart (and obviously I suck at the interpretation).  One thing that has totally helped has been a computer program and a very short window of when we actually get together.  It’s been over three years since #4 and I’ve been pretty happy about the guess work being taken out of things due to the program.  I’m actually looking into getting an app for my new Kindle but am hesitant to due so since my 4 y/o program is working so well.  You’re not alone in your fear and Lord knows sanity is always at a premium with kids.  God Bless.

Yes.

I have 4 also, ages 8 to 9 months.  The first three were born in three years.  We had four years successfully using NFP, then I was pregnant again (conception occurring on a day that should have been fine)!  We continue to practice NFP faithfully because we believe it is the right way to live and just tell ourselves that obviously these little ones were meant to be here!  Lol!

My last was conceived in a month when I had been out of town for two weeks, so I think that maybe my body’s signs were off since my schedule had been uninterrupted.  The other children were conceived in months where things were different—either due to stress, sickness, or schedule changes.  So, I do think, with my body anyway, that anything out of the normal tends to throw my body’s normal signs overboard.  I have learned to be cautious of that.

I have no good advice, but you aren’t alone.  And, even though it’s scary, I do try to encourage people to stay with it.

Take care.

I have 5 kiddos 7 down to 2 months.  I totally relate.  I have no trust in NFP.  And similarly, my husband is totally on board with it all, but doesn’t help much.  We used it successfully for about 4 months in the midst of an 8 1/2 year marriage.  I’m drowning. 
The most frustrating thing for me is I “get” all the wonderful ToB stuff, but sometimes struggle with feeling like sex is kind of a cruel joke.  Which makes me sad, because I just really adore my husband.
No help here, but you’re not alone. 

Dana (and other ladies), I know just how you feel! I have four who are now 8, 5, 3, and 18 months and was in desperate need of a break. We’ve been using the Marquette Method. If you follow the method (and they are very good at responding to questions), it seems to be the most reliable method for those of us who seem to always be fertile. My favorite aspect is how objective it is. I no longer feel like I’m the one who has to decide whether it’s a safe day (cringing at the thought of saying no because it’s a disappointment but wanting to cry at the thought of saying yes and ending up pregnant again). The method is working great for us in terms of avoiding pregnancy, but it’s still NFP and sometimes it’s still hard. My cycles are still off so we still have long periods of abstinence, but at least we feel confident in our safe days. Happy Valentine’s Day!

I second the Marquette Method. I have been pregnant 11 times. I could not figure out my body with any NFP method until I found the Marquette Method. I call it NFP for dummies-Ha! Sorry if that offends anyone. I know the other methods work very well for other women, but not me. I have constant mucous and I just can’t get my act together enough to really follow through with figuring everything out. The MMethod is a little hand held computer that just tests the hormone levels in you urine. I depend on the computer, but I’m watching my body at the same time to get more confident. I’m hoping to eventually be like other women and know my body really well. I have not been pregnant now for 1 1/2 years. It’s a little expensive at first but I’ll pay a hundred and some dollars for the peace of mind.

I’m not sure I’m understanding your question, so forgive me if I answer something you are not asking.  Is there a rainbow song?  I don’t remember one, but that doesn’t mean much.    I’m a convert, and there are a lot of songs I remember from growing up.  Rise and Shine and Give God the Glory is a great kids song that talks about the flood.  If you have Protestant kids there, there will be several that know it already.  This might give you some ideas with the verses/story http://www.dltk-bible.com/genesis/chapter6-index.htm - it has story ideas, memory verse posters, coloring pages, etc.  Hope that helps.

Cradle Catholic, but Baptist preschool product here   That “Lord said to Noah, there’s gonna be a flood-y flood-y” song immediately popped into my head when I read your post.  Maybe it’s on Youtube somewhere you could find it, but it’s fun to sing and see little kids try to keep up with the words.  Also, a good one for little kids is Down in My Heart.  (“I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.  (Where?)”)  The kids get to say “Where?” and they like that a lot.

Oops, the song I mentioned actually is Rise and Shine that sheila already said.  Well, it must be topical then!!  It does get stuck in your head.

Another good “Noah” song is to sing “Brother Noah built an ark…and on his ark he had two…” to the tune of “Old McDonald.” I second “Rise and Shine,” though. That’s a great one! If you don’t know it, I’m sure a thousand versions are on You Tube. As for verses, something about God’s promise to us would be appropriate. I don’t think there’s one specific to the Noah story that’s ideal, but look in a Bible concordance (or even the catechism) under “Covenant,” and you should find a good one.

Maybe this would be a good memory verse:  “I now set my bow in the clouds and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth.” (Genesis 9:13) Covenant is a hard word, but with kids that little you can just explain it as a promise from God.
And I agree with the suggestion of “Rise and Shine”. Another fun one that isn’t hard or Noah related is “Praise Ye The Lord”-half the kids are the “praise ye"s and the other half are the “alleluias” and they stand up and sing their parts then sit down on the other part, so there’s lots of up and down fun. This video of it is okay, although this woman isn’t a very good singer and she only does the part of the “praise ye"s, lol. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTtgvvFT0K8

I’ve taught preschool at a Catholic homeschool co-op for the last few years. I had a hard time finding free Catholic preschool activities so I used the Christian ones. I used the http://www.dltk-teach website that was mentioned above for most of our ideas. We use the bible, holiday and educational ideas. I also have a Wee Sing bible songs CD that the kids enjoy. Veggietales also has a collection of books, music cds and of course the videos that the preschoolers would enjoy.

Sorry, I totally misread your post at first. The previous answer probably wasn’t helpful. Let me try again.
For our end of year program we had the kids sing “Jesus loves me,” “If I were a butterfly” (with the hand motions) and “If you’re happy and you know it”.

Your post office should have all the information you need. Most are even able to take the pictures right there but the Walmart photo center should also take passport photos for less money.  Also, look on http://travel.state.gov/passport/get/first/first_830.html There’s a lot of information there.  They say it takes 4 - 6 weeks, but we got ours in about 2.  We did not pay the extra money to get them done quickly. Good luck.

Go to the state dept website. She will need her birth certificate, an original with seal. SS card and one other govt issued ID.  Cost is $120. Should take 3-6 weeks. You can expedite it for another $60.

It is not quite accurate that you need an ORIGINAL birth certificate to get a passport.  You need a state-issued/county-issued certified copy with embossed seal.  Some states—Maryland is one—no longer issue anything that could be called an original, all birth records are now computerized.

Is your husband the only one earning the money? Can you find time to work part time to pay for the repairs?  He may be right inthinking that you need to save money. Maybe when your kids are older you can start working more and then afford a nicer place or some home improvements. It’s easy to look around and compare to how other people live, but very often they are in debt or they work and send their kids to daycare.

This is how I would phrase it:  by making repairs to your house (your biggest investment) you are increasing the value of the investment.  Yes, it might take some time to recoup this investment, but you are living it in and it should be safe for your family to reside there.  Where can he put the money that will earn a good return?  In the stock market?  Money market accounts are not worth it, the interest rates are nearly zero.  Another suggestion is to split the amount in half.  You take 5k to make repairs, he takes 5K to invest.

Feeling Stuck:  What kind of a house did your husband grow up in?  My husband grew up in a house that was in disrepair, so that was his “normal”. He still doesn’t “get it” after 30 years.  I can totally relate to your situation.

I wonder how your husband grew up.  A friend of mine’s husband grew up in poverty.  He had to be in an orphanage for a couple years when it got so bad his parents could not care for him.  He carried this into adulthood with the way he manages money.  Always afraid he would not have enough.

It seems not right to me for a spouse to bring up divorce like that.  I would want to get to the bottom of that comment.  What you are saying sounds very reasonable.  There is a different between being frugal and being miserly.  It sounds to me like your husband is being miserly.  He should not control all the financial decisions.

I think it is time to re-visit a couple of Dave Ramsey’s lesson and even both of you call into the show if necessary.  Dave specifically does NOT recommend living like misers and paupers and his theory, as you’ll recall, is that by holding your money in a tight fist you keep it but you also do not let any more money or blessings in.  I think you’re husband may have become so fixated on those early steps that he missed the overall lesson of what Financial PEACE means.  Blessings as you work this out!

Revlon Color-Stay!!
They are tubes with color on one side and clear gloss on the other. My hands down favorite lip color out there.

You might want to check this listing in today’s news about lead in lipsticks!
http://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/400-lipstick-brands-contain-lead-fda-says/2012/02/14/gIQAhOyeDR_story.html?hpid=z3

JJs Mom - several years ago, the pastor of my church gave a homily on Lenten sacrifices and he suggested that we give up something related to each of the 5 senses in order to mortify the senses.  Some ideas: for sight: give up secular books or TV shows; for hearing: give up secular music; for taste: give up a favorite food or eating out; for touch: turn the heat and/or A/C to a less comfortable temp or take shorter showers at a cooler temperature; for smell: give up scented body wash, perfume, your favorite shampoo, scented candles, etc.  In addition, you can take any money you save (by buying generic shampoo or not eating in restaurants) and give it to charity or spend the time you save (by not watching tv for example) to read the Bible or other religious books.

Oh, as to WHY you feel called to something more…my guess is that the Holy Spirit is prompting you for a deeper relationship with God!

God bless you Lou, after having 11 pregnancies and still being open to life at age 45, in my opinion you deserve anything that will make you look or feel better. Go for it! Hernias can be very painful and can lead to serious complications. I would follow your doctor’s advice. He seems to understand your concerns. Prayers for a successful surgery and recovery are coming!

Lou,

Staying open to life means more than being open to conception.  Sometimes it means caring for yourself and the children you already have.  It sounds like you need to get this hernia fixed. I think there can be serious problems if you let a hernia go without repairing it.

Fertility significantly decreases by age 45.  I’m told NFP is reliable to avoid a pregnancy.  It may be hard if you have never used it before because couples usually learn with experience and sometimes that experience is an unplanned pregnancy.

Sounds like you need to get some medical consultation re: implications of future pregnancy after a hernia repair/tummy tuck.  Maybe get the surgeon & ob/gyn to conference with you? More information = less wondering & worrying!
If a doc told me s/he can do both in one operation, I don’t know that I would even give it a second thought!  God bless you & I hope you can get some relief soon.

Hernias can be postponed for a while if they’re asymptomatic, but if you’re in pain, you should definitely have it repaired (I’m an RN, and my husband is actually about to have a hernia repair).  I’m assuming that the “tummy tuck” portion of the surgery would have to be paid for out of pocket?  If you were to have another pregnancy, it wouldn’t be impossible to have the hernia repaired again.  The tummy tuck would also have to be revised, and again, insurance likely would not cover it, so that might be a hard pill to swallow after paying for it out of pocket initially.  But, as Anon pointed out, at 45 your fertility is going to decrease, so hopefully that combined with NFP would make a pregnancy pretty unlikely.