I guess it depends on how the information is presented to you. I definitely DID NOT appreciate the postpartum nurse who handed me a bag of formula on the way out of the hospital with a very condescending smile saying “Remember, help is just a bottle away!” But I did appreciate all of the advice and help I received when I thought I was a failing at what was considered the “right way” to breast feed by all of those super moms around me.

My advice to any mom who is going to breastfeed is this: don’t let problems spiral.  Breastfeeding is a knack, like bowling or driving, so you can anticipate some frustration, maybe a bit of pain in the first couple of days.  But if you can’t say “Today is a little better than yesterday!” get help.  Not only get help, get seen, and be persistent.

If a mom wants to formula feed, those freebies will come in handy.  But for a mom who is going to breastfeed, those little bottles will call out her name in the middle of the night when she’s desperate, and potentially ruin her plans.  Leave the freebies for the moms who have chosen formula feeding.  Instead, get some great breastfeeding resources books, and have a few phone numbers handy.  What I could have used was a sister or close friend or relative that I could have reached out to late at night.  A lifeline person!

Regina, your comment reminds me that I let my problems with Eric linger on far too long.  By the time we got to his two week check up, the feeding problem had reached crisis level.  I should have followed my instincts earlier that something was wrong.  As a mom, I need to remember to reach out to my pregnant friends and remind them that I’m hear to support and encourage them - even if that happens in the middle of the night!  Thanks for sharing!

I always say (just like Regina above) that there is sometimes a learning period that can be quite difficult.  I nursed all 5 of my children, and I don’t think it’s the easier thing to do, especially at first.  If new moms had the expectation that the first 6 weeks or so could be really rough, I think more would stick with it.  Definitely, it would help to find a friend or support person who could talk you through the tough times.  It was much easier to find somene to talk me out of it, which then made you feel like you were really screwing up. 
I always ended up throwing away all those free samples I got at the hospital and in the mail.  I don’t really think they would influence the decision anyways…you are either going to do it, or you are looking for any excuse to not do it.

As a breastfeeding mother, I know how tough it can be to breastfeed.  It is not as natural as so many people expect it to be.  I feel that we need to teach mothers that this might not be easy, but it is important to try.

I am not saying that formula is bad, but I feel that it is too easily to just give up on breast feeding because it is difficult.  I believe that many mothers forget the benefits of breastfeeding and that it will start to get better. 

I think that this is a good decision.  I think that this is a way to have mothers start to consider breastfeeding, and possibly give it a try when they might not have before. 

They will still have the option to purchase it at the store if they choose to.

Something new mom’s frequently encounter is the baby’s sucking instinct is severely impaired due to delivery room drugs…especially EPIDURALS, which MOST moms now have.  They blame themselves when it is the drug’s effect of suppression.  It often takes DAYS to be worked out of the baby’s system. (It can lead to all kinds of confusion and difficulties). Many 1st time moms have more of this drug-than in subsequent deliveries, and therein lies the problem. Having good resources, but especially a close friend/relative to call is the MOST important support she can have. Dr. Sears Book, ‘The Nursing Book’ is one of the best ones to recommend.

The best resource I’ve found is http://www.kellymom.com.  It can help you determine if you hit a small snag or a pit and therefore when to get professional help.

The biggest thing for me was to realize that no schedule should be assumed or more importantly inforced in those early weeks.  Your on baby time now.

I would like to add my support for lactation consultants and point out that they are not just there before you leave the hospital, but also in many locations they have appointments and can help out afterward. Friends and free services like those from LLL are great, but I really needed help from a professional. I had several appointments with the lactation consultants following the births of both my kids. With my first, they helped me get things going well after some initial problems. With the second, the consultant gave me a lot of great ideas to try, but was honest enough to tell me that my daughter was having some major problems with nursing and not to feel guilty that I had very little chance of getting her to nurse full-time. Coming from a professional, who I knew dealt with all kinds of nursing mothers full-time, I could accept this instead of beating myself up about it.

I’m not sure that completely eliminating formula samples is the way to go. I think what they did at the hospital where my daughter was born was a good compromise. They simply gave you a choice of whether you wanted to have a lactation consultant or help with bottle-feeding and only gave you the formula sample if you asked for it. The coupons and stuff they give you can be helpful for someone if breastfeeding is simply not an option for whatever reason.

As a strong supporter of breastfeeding wherever possible, I have tried hard to steer my friends who were new to it in the direction of La Leche League, either to actual groups, or to the book “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.” However, I think that nothing beats offering to sit down with someone who is considering it and just talking about her concerns with her. As more experienced breastfeeding moms, we should try really hard to connect with women who may not have a good role model, and when she has the baby, to let her know that our non-judgmental advice and support will be hers if she wants it.

As for hospitals, I think they should tell every mom that there are those free samples available, but not hand them over unless requested. And more than anything, the nurses and doctors should always approach the issue positively: yes, first-time mom, you CAN probably nurse your baby. Let us help you, and when you have troubles, we won’t give you the old “I knew you couldn’t” attitude. A huge part of successful breastfeeding is just knowing that the challenges you face are fairly common, and that ordinary women—not supermoms—can overcome them!

Finally, the medical establishment should make it clear what is scientifically known: breastfeeding on demand is, ounce for ounce, far superior to any other form of nourishment, and that it is worth a great deal of trouble on the establishment’s part to help women, esp. the ones in lower-middle class or immigrant situations, to breastfeed successfully. And where breastfeeding is truly not possible, that this is misfortune, and not sin on the mother’s part, any more than having a medically necessary C-section is a sin on her part.

I would tell a young mom that breastfeeding is great, but it’s not going to guarantee that your baby will never be sick, nor have ear infections, be thin as an adult or have a really high IQ.  It might make a mom lose the baby weight quickly, but then again, it might not.

I nursed all four of my children.  I was lucky in that it wasn’t all that difficult and I had a good disposition to nurse (ie somewhat laid back and too lazy to make bottles).  But it’s not for everyone.  There are deep seated cultural reasons why some women don’t nurse.  I’m not sure if browbeating these people will do anything more than annoy them. 

Should doctors or hospitals continue to give out free samples of formula?  Hmmm.  I always appreciated a “saved” trip to the store.  When my doctor gives me free samples of medicine, I’m always grateful.  So, yes, I think they continue to offer it to those who need it.

In my personal experience, free local lactation consultants through the hospital are the reason I was able to continue nursing my daughter. I gave up initially after two weeks and went to pumping and bottle feeding for three weeks. After realizing how insane that was, I visited them almost daily and they helped me get my 5-week-old nursing again, by the grace of God! I agree that formula samples can be too tempting and I think should only be offered if necessary or requested. I know I would have given up if it hadn’t been for those wonderful women. Not only was it simply much cheaper than formula, but I know the bond that my daughter and I have is due in such a large part to all of our nursing time together. I always wonder how the women 20 or 30 years ago who breast fed when it wasn’t popular managed to do it with little or no support. After going through such a tough experience personally, I wish I would have been told a little more about the possibility of it being tough initially, but definitely easier and worth it in the end. I know I tell that to every new mom!

It wasn’t until my sixth baby that I got my really difficult nurser.  I am thankful that I had so much experience behind me before she arrived, both in nursing my other babies and in my training as a doula/student midwife.  I knew the techniques I needed to utilize with her to make her open her mouth and actually take the nipple, instead of pushing the breast out with her tongue and clenching her jaw shut.  I don’t really know what brand new moms who encounter the same problems would do!  So I have a lot of sympathy with moms who just couldn’t manage to breastfeed, despite the work and intentions.  My daughter was vastly improved at 24 hours, and it took about a week to virtually eliminate the problem, but every now and again, even at 4 months, she’ll still get lazy and not want to open her mouth correctly.

(For those wondering how to solve such a problem, it’s just a matter of pulling the chin down while they latch, and being patient until they grasp a good mouthful.  The maneuver leaves you wishing you were an octopus, however.  It can also be complicated by a very angry, uncooperative baby.  You need to be extremely vigilant to be sure they learn this needs to happen every time they nurse!)

I think that we need to provide more readily available support to women who choose to breastfeed, especially those without the finances to search out their own lactation consultants. 
The hospital that I gave birth at had a class that I took but they did not have a lactation consultant on hand.  Luckily there was a baby boutique down the street with a nice staff and a room just for lactation consultants with a comfy rocker and nursing stool and they would even come to your house.  However, all this I had to pay for myself.  I got help in the beginning because right away I realized I was not doing it correctly.  Nothing beat having real practical help in those first few weeks.  Those first few weeks were painful.  And when I called my aunt she said if you want to continue to breastfeed just stick with it and it will get better. I had no one else around me to help out with it and who had nursed their children.

When one of my friends had a baby I told her to call me in the middle of the night if she had to and I would help to the best of my ability.

As far as the formula distribution.  I am ambivalent either way.  I don’t think it is the hospitals duty to discharge you with formula.  Although, I think I received a total of 3 containers of formula, one from the birth prep class, one from the hospital and from the pediatrician.  With my second we just left them there and told the nurses to give them to someone who needed them.

I don’t care about the free formula samples so much—they generally sit in my pantry till the expiration date—but I do appreciate getting a new diaper bag! 

The lactaction consultants were a God send for my last two little ones that had latching problems.  I can’t praise their help and expertise enough.  I didn’t go to one for my first and suffered on my own for three months before latching on and nursing became easier.  For sure having support-spousal, family, friends, professional would be my number one reason for successful breastfeeding.  I see how the free formula can be a temptation, but I don’t see how a few free days or week supply of free formula will turn you in favor to only bottle-feeding.  I was one that had to supplement with formula (only 1/2-1 oz) only for the first four days b/c my milk always took so long to “come-in”.  I appreciated the freebies and was able to only breastfeed for all three of my children after those first few days.

They should save the free formula for mothers and babies who really need it. Mostly everyone I know threw out their free samples.  It seems like such a waste.
Breastfeeding is the best, but a woman should not be made to feel guilty if for whatever reason she cannot breastfeed or chooses to stop. No one knows the circumstances.
Hospitals should give out the baby bag with free formula for those who request it. It would save a lot of money.

I always enjoyed receiving the freebies at the hospital. With each child I nursed varying lengths of time, so eventually, they did come in handy.  For those of you who receive them and don’t need or want them, please please don’t throw them away.  Donate them to a Women’s Shelter, a food pantry, or your local Pregnancy Resource Center.  My PRC collects unopened formula (as well as diapers, clothing and baby items) for new mothers who have chosen life and are in need after the birth of their child.

I was extremely blessed in that all four of my children were easy to nurse, and I had an abundance of milk.  I recognize that it is not easy for every mom or for every baby.  I would advise a new mom to call a friend or family member who has nursed.  EVEN if it is the middle of the night!  Those of us who are older (my oldest is 20) need to offer our support to younger moms. 

I noticed that someone commented on the “moms who nursed 20-30 years ago.”  I was one of those moms.  Not only was nursing not as popular or as common as it is now, my own mother was VEHEMENTLY opposed to breast feeding.  She did everything she could to sabotage my efforts.  Being stubborn (and rather lazy with easy nursers), I held out.  I couldn’t see making bottles when I could co-sleep and my babies would have nice full tummies.

I saw my sister-in-law struggle with breastfeeding her first just before I was pregnant with my first. It was really good that I learned that. She went back to the hospital to see the lactation consultant and stuck with it for a while. So when my son was born, I no longer had the assumptions that it just happened naturally and easily. I think that knowledge does have a lot to do with moms sticking with it. If you can get through the first couple weeks, it does become (for most people) much easier and, yes, quite natural. Now I don’t want to scare new or expectant mothers—sometimes it IS that easy right from the start. But if you feel that it’s YOUR fault when you have trouble, it starts to snowball.

I did have a couple calls with the lactation consultant with both of my children. Each baby had different approaches/issues. But I was lucky that the hospital lactation consultants were available for phone calls after I was home.

I don’t think that they should necessarily completely STOP free samples of formula, but at least make it part of a conversation about feeding choices, instead of just automatically handing it to every new mom. Really, it’s not from the hospital, it’s marketing from the formula companies! That said, many new moms could use it. I kept one small can in case of emergencies (if I was stuck away unexpectedly or needed to be on a medication not allowed with breast feeding). But the rest I donated to a food bank. I agree with the poster above—if you are given formula you don’t need, someone will need it!

I had trouble with nursing my firstborn.  We moved to a new state a few months before my baby was born, so I didn’t really have friends to lean on.  What helped me was to attend some La Leche League meetings prior to birth.  When I delivered and had problems with breastfeeding I had already established a bit of a relationship with the group leaders and had someone to call for help.  In the end, I also ended up calling a lactation consultant, too.  Breastfeeding was tough for me for about 4 weeks and then things finally clicked and we had a great nursing relationship for 22 months.

Okay, I tried to post something and lost my entire comment. It was too long anyway.  At any rate, I recently participated in the September Breastfeeding Carnival and interviewed my mom-in-law who also happens to be a lactation consultant. In the post, I also discussed why I believe nursing came so naturally to me: Because I KNEW I had someone on deck (my mom-in-law) if the going got tough. That kind of one-on-one support is invaluable. I wish every woman was related to a lactation consultant.

There are fortunately other resources out there: the Catholics Mothers’ Nursing League and La Leche League (Google them to get their websites). In addition, other nursing moms are great resources.

As for free formula being doled out to new moms, I don’t agree with it. It’s true that my formula ended up in the hands of someone who needed it (a friend of mine who had had breast reduction surgery and was unable to nurse); however, there’s a reason formula companies give out free formula to new moms. It’s not because it’s a nice thing to do. It’s because it works. There will be weary moms who reach for the free formula when they’re faced with a crying baby and maybe sore nipples or some other breastfeeding challenge. Once the free stockpile is depleted, the moms will start paying for the pricey formula. That’s exactly what the formula company’s want. Those goody bags are just a part of their marketing strategy.

Free formula should be reserved for places other than than hospitals. Why? Because hospitals have a responsibility to promote best healthcare practices, and we know that the health benefits of breastfeeding for baby and mom are many.

Formula is a wonderful invention for women and babies who cannot breastfeed, but it really should be a backup plan. Nursing should be the cultural norm (not that we should ever, ever make moms who don’t nurse feel guilty) and in order for that to happen society and the Church need to do everything possible to support women in their roles as nursing moms.

As an aside, I’ve personally discovered that ecological breastfeeding - when you nurse on demand for both nourishment and comfort - is a beautiful part of NFP. It helps to naturally space children and to take away the need to pray about “just reasons” for postponing a pregnancy. You simply are caring for the needs of the child that is in your arms at that moment. It may not work for everyone, but it has been a blessing in my life. NFPandmore.org has info on EBF and its tie to NFP.

Sorry for the lengthy post. Lisa, thanks for bringing up an important topic. God bless.

Aarrggh… Pregnesia strikes again. Please forgive the ugly typo. I meant: “That’s exactly what the formula companies want.”

I agree with asking for help asap when you have problems, the best thing I did was buzz the nurse when I developed a blood blister after not quite a full day of nursing. Fortunately she knew what the latching problem was and helped me fix it.

I also agree that it’s worth knowing that it isn’t always easy at first.  I have sensitive skin and I’m glad I read that chapping of the nipples for the first week is normal for people with very sensitive skin and that this doesn’t last (purlan or it’s equivalent works wonders for sensitive skin).

Emily

Please do NOT throw away your free formula samples!!! I always request them so I can get the diaper bag and diaper coupons and then take a trip to crisis pregnancy with the formula or to the food pantry. There are those who really need it!

I think confidence and support are key.

My mom never had much success with nursing so I went into the deal with an extreme lack of confidence. When I was expecting our first and my OB asked if I planned to breastfeed I said, “I’m going to try.”

She told me, “No. There’s no trying. If you are planning to do it, you will do it. If you have difficulties, we will get you the support you need.”

Her confidence in me when I had none made a big difference.

That said, I wish someone had told me how much nursing can hurt—especially in the beginning and especially with your first baby. That was surprise that had me second-guessing if I was “doing it right.”

I was also totally unprepared for nursing difficulties with my son, and even more unprepared having just moved to Mississippi a month before his birth by the open hostility the nurses in a Women’s Hospital had to breast feeding.  I had one that used to call me on the phone every time while I was trying to nurse to see if I was ready to give up.  My son was only 2 days old! 
I did like the free bags, though.  They came with ice packs and little carriers which made pumping and storing easier.

My advice—Be prepared to stick with it for a while.  It can be frustrating, but your baby will not starve.  Don’t worry about supplementing for formula, just BE SURE to pump, and pump often!

I breastfed both of my children and vowed to myself that I would nurse until they decided it was time to stop.  At 8 mo and 9 mo, they were done.  It wasn’t easy.  I work full-time and had to pump. For some reason, I couldn’t pump with my first, but he adapted well and took a bottle during the day and I was able to nurse in the morning and all night when I got home, and of course, all weekend long.  That kept my supply up.  With the 2nd, I produced enough milk to keep her in milk, so that she rarely had formula during the day—we did have a major problem with her and finding the right bottle.  The Playtex Nursers were her choice.  She loved sticking her hand up into the bottle and “massaging” the bag.  After she finished nursing, I wanted to continue to pump to donate my milk, but couldn’t get the organization I contacted to respond to my offer.

I had such a hard time nursing my daughter for the first 2 months.  The thought of giving up was very close several times and one night I almost sent my husband out for formula at 2am.  Each time I was close we would have a good nursing session and it would give me enough encouragement to continue (thanks to our mother Mary’s help).  I kept setting goals of lasting another week.
Our combination of oversupply and latching difficulties required pumping, cup feeding and then nursing—-followed by more pumping if she didn’t nurse well.  Thankfully my husband was very supportive and paid special attention to our son (13 months older) while I was working on the nursing.  We’re also blessed to have my SIL who’s a MD specializing in lactation issues—she was just a call away and made the 2 hour drive for hands-on assistance at crucial times.  I don’t know that I would have hung in there without their help and support.  My daughter is now 11 months and nurses like a champ (when she’s not busy being nosy).  It was worth it.
As for Mom’s of past years going against the tide - my Mom nursed all 10 of us when it was definitely not in vogue (we range from 42-57 now) and she also used to tell her OB that she’d eat a balanced diet (she’d been a dietician prior to marriage) during pregnancy and not worry about the scale whenever he’d get on her about gaining more than 15lbs.  SHe’s now 83 and in great health - thanks be to God.

I don’t agree with free formula being given out in hospitals or by medical professionals. It implies that formula is necessary and as good as breastfeeding. Formula is so expensive that impeding the breastfeeding relationship in those early, fragile postpartum days may result in low income mothers having to spend so much money on formula. Breastfeeding is free! Money should instead be put toward funding more lactation consultants and mandatory education for nurses and doctors on lactation.

I am Canadian, so I’m not sure if it’s the same in the US, but here I understand medical schools do not offer much education on breastfeeding. So women assume doctors - especially OB/Gyns and Paediatricians - are experts on breastfeeding. After working for the director of perinatal/paeds here at a large affluent hospital I was stunned to learn at meetings how few doctors knew or cared to know even the basics. Yet these same docs would tell women, “Oh, you don’t have enough milk” or whatever - discouraging and impeding the breastfeeding relationship.

My cousin is an OB/Gyn from a large and very well respected medical school. She said in their whole medical school time the only education on breastfeeding was one half hour that was optional and most students skipped.

I have a friend whose doctor told her that she couldn’t nurse her baby because her milk ducts hadn’t dropped yet. What?!!! Another woman was told she couldn’t breastfeed because her breasts were too big. I bet the doctor didn’t want to have to hold her hand through learning to nurse a baby if she had any issues trying to hold her breast or whatever. And so many women are told to supplement by well-meaning friends, family, even medical staff, until their milk comes in. Nursing more of course stimulates the milk - and the colostrum until then is baby’s liquid gold. It’s **normal** for it to take a few days.

It’s one thing if women who are informed decide they don’t want to nurse, but it’s absolutely terrible if they want to nurse and are given improper advice or inadequate support.

I can’t rave enough about La Leche League. I have a relative who so strongly cautioned me against the LLL as marginalizing women that I didn’t go with my first of four children. Now I’m librarian! lol

The LLL Leaders are lactation consultants. Call if you have trouble. One girlfriend called our LLL Leader here when she was living in Switzerland and had a baby on a nursing strike.

The best advice I’ve ever heard is not to give up breastfeeding until you can nurse lying down. Because once you can do that, you’re on your way. You can’t lie down to prepare and mix formula, but you can rest while you breastfeed.

Pax to all mums. And if anyone is struggling to nurse a first baby, it may be comforting to know that many of us have no problems with one or two babes, and then have a nursling with challenges. I had no problems with my three boys but a few rough weeks with my fourth, a girl. It was very humbling. But with help from LLL and a community health lactation consultant, we worked it out. She’s still nursing at 24 months!

The freebies actually saved my breastfeeding career!  I was at a point with my first child, maybe about 5 weeks in, where I had let pain go too long and had some pretty painful “wounds” because I had her latching on incorrectly.  Everytime I tried to nurse, my eyes would roll in the back of my head during latch on due to the pain of her nursing on an open wound.  One night I was so desperate, I sobbed while handing her to my husband asking him to give her one of those freebie bottles.  That little bottle (the only one I have ever used, nursing 3 babies into toddlerhood, so far) that gave me the little break I needed to regroup, and call in the troops for help.  I cried to my mom that night on the phone with the guilt of giving her a bottle (silly), but it gave my body the little break it needed from pain.  I made some phone calls to nursing family, went out the next day, bought a pump just to heal the wounds, then had a great visit at the pediatrician where the nurse practictioner was willing to sit with me while I nursed to see if she could figure out what was causing the problem.  And viola, she did!  Positioning-I had her too far to my side, or something like that.  I sort of have this personal “anti-freebies” feeling when I’m in the hospital, but then I think back to how that one tiny bottle in the middle of the night helped me to nurse for years to come.