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Email a FriendPosted by jen on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 12:42 AM (EDT):
I really needed something smile about just now. Thank you!!
The Husband Can
the stranger must not
Posted by Arwen Mosher in Family on Thursday, February 02, 2012 10:31 PM
I shared this on Twitter last week and enough people seemed to find it as funny as I do that I thought I’d share it here in case anyone needs a quick laugh.
Miss Manners on the correct way to ask a woman if she is pregnant: enjoy!
Comments
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Posted by BigTummy on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 4:15 AM (EDT):
I’m on my 4th pregnancy in under 6 years, and naturally carry all my weight in my tummy anyway, so even when I am NOT pregnant I look it, and I am very regularly asked “When are you due?” or “Are you expecting?” I hate it, but not so much because it hurts my feelings (hey, I own a mirror! I know I have a chubby tummy!), but I hate it because then I have to tell that inquisitive person that I am in fact NOT pregnant and then they get all embarrassed, flustered, apologetic, etc., and I just feel badly for them! It can be awkward. :o) I have more than once, sad to say, just went along with it so as not to embarrass anyone. Usually I find the person is asking with joy or excitement, so I really don’t take any offense at all to it. That is cute though - usually I tell DH so fast he doesn’t have time to inquire!
Posted by Rebecca on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 10:09 AM (EDT):
When my 4th was around 4-6 months old an older women was cooing over her while we were in line at the bank. Once she started looking at the rest of my brood, she looked at me and said “You aren’t pregnant again are you?” I have rarely ever felt worse about myself. And I have a feeling it wasn’t just a comment on my post-pregnancy figure, but the number of children as well, but still. I agree, unless it is clear a women will be delivering within weeks, keep those questions and comments to yourself. Pregnant women who want to share and gush will let you know without a doubt anyway.
Posted by Mama Toad on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 4:30 PM (EDT):
My mother has the best story about this: Soon after delivering my younger sister, my mother was walking around the hospital and stopped outside the nursery window, where my little sister was sleeping (this was in 1974). An elderly nun who was a nurse at the hospital saw my mother in her hospital gown and slippers, staring lovingly at the babies, and gently came up to her, patted her arm, and said, “Don’t worry, dear, your baby will be here soon.”
Posted by Annie on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 4:55 PM (EDT):
I think she should add in there about touching a pregnant woman’s belly. Neither my husband nor my mom hardly touch my bump, but I have had MANY people this time around, including complete strangers, not only touch but basicly massage by belly. Yes, I am having twins and at 35 weeks I have a very large baby bump, but it still amazes me how people will invade my personal space without asking!
Posted by Lynn on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 10:00 PM (EDT):
Yes, and Miss Manners has something a Mom can do. She said that if the expectant Mom would double over and moan as if the touch brought on immediate, painful labor pains, that not only would that person quit EVER touching her, it would probably cure them from wanting to touch anyone else’s tummy for life! Ha! A great community service, too, she jests….
Posted by StephC on Friday, Feb 3, 2012 6:43 PM (EDT):
I’ve always thought that Dave Barry’s words of wisdom on this issue were perfect:
“You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.”
Posted by Kate W. on Monday, Feb 6, 2012 9:45 PM (EDT):
Why are people so bothered by strangers touching their beautiful pregnant bellies? What a sign of love and life in a culture so lacking in it these days.
Posted by Michelle Reitemeyer on Monday, Feb 6, 2012 11:11 PM (EDT):
I definitely find pregnant bellies to be irresistibly attractive…except for my own. Especially when I’ve had little toddlers, or nursing infants, while pregnant, I get “touched out”...everybody seems to want a piece of me! Those last few months of pregnancy have me feeling particularly fat, ugly, bloated, sore, achy, miserable…the last thing I want is to have my body rubbed by a stranger. I am also not of the touchy-feely type anyway - hugs, perhaps, with girlfriends, on occasions that warrant it, but that’s about it. So, even though I think another woman’s “bump” is so very cute, I avoid the temptation to rub it out of respect for the fact that they, like me, just might not be interested in sharing their body parts.
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