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A Thing or Three

by Sarah Reinhard in Homemaking on Monday, August 03, 2009 6:00 AM

“How do you do it all?

It’s a question I’ve heard since high school, into college, and even as recently as a month ago.

I thought that’s how life was supposed to go.  Isn’t it normal to have all these things going on?

I didn’t realize how much time I wasn’t spending on my new marriage until my husband looked at me one evening, and said quietly, “We can’t have a family if we don’t have time to make one.”  That stopped my life of four evening meetings a week and at least as many weekend obligations each month.  I started exploring my priorities and toning things down quite a bit.

Then we had kids.

We discerned that it was appropriate for me to keep working.  My boss, who was also our parish priest, was supportive of me bringing our children to work at the parish office with me.

I have found, over the years, a method that helps me to keep things straight.  It involves committing to three things each day.

I know, I know.  You have more than three things that need to be done before you take your shower each day! Hear me out:

Make a List

It ends up being more than three things for me, most days.  But I find that I can only remember three things at a time.  If there are things to be done around the house (there are always things that need done around the house!), I can only ever manage to remember three of them at a time, unless the house is my whole day.

So I’ll list three things for the house.  Then I’ll list three things that I’m going to get done on the computer.  Some days, I include three errands I need to get done.  On the days I’m in the parish office, there are never more than three things that I’m committing to getting done there.

With the interruptions I face at home and office, three is about the max I can ever get done.  Something important is always cropping up: a sick child, a project that can’t wait, an opportunity that will pass tomorrow, a friend who needs help today.

I’m not suggesting that you subdivide and keep the same 100 things on your to-do list that have always been there.  You might have categories, but be conservative.  This isn’t your justification for the 500 things on your list, things you probably won’t get done anyway.

I don’t include the things in my normal routine, like making lunches in the mornings or taking a shower.  Right after the birth of my second daughter, though, I did include those things.  Right after my maternity leave was over, I included even more basic items, because it was all I could do to figure out how to get the three of us out the door each morning.

Keep in mind what you can actually get done.  Make sure you write them down in a place you’ll see them or on a piece of paper you’ll have with you.

Commit to Three

Maybe all you can commit to are three things for the entire day.  In a house with an infant or guests or any number of other special circumstances, there’s no shame in that.

Make a promise to yourself, and if that’s not a powerful enough motivator, inspire yourself with a reward.  How about 15 minutes of time on the back porch with your favorite novel once the three things are done?  Maybe a piece of that secret stash of salt water taffy speaks to you.

For me, seeing the crossed off items is a joy all its own.  If I find myself with extra time, well, there’s never a lack of things that need done!

Forgive Yourself

There are days, weeks, and months when three things are, quite simply, too many.

That’s okay.  Forgive yourself.  Your goal each day, really, is to do what God wants you to do, isn’t it?  So maybe your three things today weren’t in His plan, for reasons you may not understand until…well, maybe you’ll never understand them.

Smile.  There’s always tomorrow.  And the next day.  And the day after that.

Repeat, hands folded.

When I find myself unable to get anything done or when I’m in a rut and the world is crashing down around me, there is one solution that never fails to help me ...

Prayer

It sounds too easy, doesn’t it?

Don’t be fooled.  You can get more done by starting your day on your knees, with your hands folded, than you can any other way.  Make it your top priority.  Ask God for help.  He’ll send it, though it may be in a different form than you’re expecting.

—Sarah Reinhard writes and blogs about faith, motherhood, and more at Just Another Day of Catholic Pondering.

Resources:

• Sink Reflections by Marla Cilley
• Saving Dinner: The Menus, Recipes, and Shopping Lists to Bring Your Family Back to the Table
• SavingDinner.com
• Productivity @ Home

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What I Learned From an Earring

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