Little Flower’s comment is the best answer!  We’ll never be able to control the little noises around us.  If everyone where perfectly quiet, an ambulance would blair by!  Also, bear in my the many people who may be exercising patience toward yourself and your annoying incidentals—maybe not noise, maybe your perfume? your clicky shoes? your nose blowing? your singing talent?

Great article. I’ve written plenty on this topic and will share a few of my own thoughts. While a distraction-free, awe-inspiring Mass is the ideal, I’ve found that being the mom three little ones sometimes makes this a far cry from reality (no, I don’t condone misbehavior, but just keeping your kids in line can be distracting). But my kids aren’t the only source of distraction for me. I’ve been distracted by other things, too.The whooshing of an oxygen tank. I’ve been to celebrations where my mind starts to wander when a priest gives a long, rambling Homily, or I’ve cringed when an organist hits the wrong note.

It’s during times like these - when I’m not fully present - that I remind myself that these so-called distractions aren’t always the problem. The problem is me and my own failure to focus on Christ’s sacrificial love.

So how do I stay focused and take these distractions and sanctify them in some small way? It’s simple really. I consider whatever is distracting me and I turn it into a prayer just as, you mentioned, St. Therese of Lisieux learned to do. She once said, “I have many distractions, but as soon as I am aware of them, I pray for those people, the thought of whom is diverting my attention. In this way they reap the benefit of my distraction.”

I ask the same of myself and others when “insufferable distractions” seem many during Mass. If we happen to notice a toddler pinching his baby sister or a mother endlessly rocking a fussy baby in church, let us rejoice that they have overcome the obstacles to get there (and believe me, getting a house full of little ones out the door and to church is no easy undertaking). If we see a child misbehaving, let us pray for grace for the parents of the defiant child (and let us remember that everyone has bad days; a child who is behaving obnoxiously may be just having an off moment). Or if a teenager wearing an inappropriate outfit catches our eye, let us pray God will touch this young person and reveal his love to her so that she (or he) won’t need to use her (his) body to attract attention. Let us not be distracted from our worship but may we reserve our judgment and instead pray for the very people who seem to be pulling us away from Christ.

Blessings!

I don’t think poor public behavior is limited to inside the walls of church, it is everywhere in our society.  I recently attended the ballet and my chair was repeatedly kicked by a bored toddler.  What he was doing at the ballet is beyond me.  I finally had to turn around and address the hapless mother, who was doing her best to “explain” proper behavior, rather than simply removing him from the scene.  I still don’t understand why children (I am not talking about infants) have to eat or drink during Mass.  Can we not go one hour without eating?  I’m tired of the water bottles and crunching of cheerios, the cell phones and the toy trains on the pew, not to mention the Children’s Liturgy of the Word when the children run past the tabernacle.  I try to attend daily Mass when I can, and unfortunately on Sunday, I do my best to ignore the distractions, but it’s not easy these days.

Honestly, the distraction at my large, suburban, east coast parish (or my “should-be parish”) is just insane. And the main noise-makers are the elderly! Seriously, I was shocked that the older generation was so irreverent before, during, and after Mass. They have been in this parish their whole lives, and they all live near each other, so it’s not like this is the only time they see each other. Though the elderly make the most noise they aren’t the only ones—there’s the gum chewing parents and teens, the cellphone-using dads, and the chatty moms—it’s just awful. Finally, my husband and I, after several discussions with the pastor, have had to leave a join a different parish. Our new parish is blessedly reverent!

Regarding crying babies during Mass, a priest at the parish I grew up in once commented, “Every baby that cries should be music to our ears, since it means that child was not aborted.”

Kate, I appreciate your comments so much. Yes, the distractions are many…for all of us. Sometimes my largest distractions are those who are shaking their heads at the misbehavior of my children. I spend the remainder of those Masses working for perfect behavior from my children…only to be sorely disappointed because they are, well, children. We are all doing the best we can with what we have. I love it when I get to Mass and can spend that time in reverent prayer, but I also realize that in a room with 500 people, someone is bound to cry, sneeze, snicker, or faint at any given moment. I love the example of St Therese. Offer it up. That’s what we are called to do.

Heidi, I absolutely agree that the “evil one rejoices when he’s able to cause division”. That does not mean that ‘tolerance’ should be extended to the person in front of me who is filing her nails or talking on his cell during Mass (I don’t mean answering his cell, I mean talking on it). As I said, I am speaking of behavior, not the internal forum. With all due respect, this is a misguided view of tolerance and also serves, as I said, to give a poor example to others, esp children. The “charism of hospitality” seeks to lift others up.  True tolerance lifts everyone up to recognize the Sacrifice that is being happening in their presence out of Love for them. As an Evangelical, you probably heard the (derogatory) expression when a group of Catholics come in: “Here comes everybody.” The Catholic Church has thankfully always welcomed everybody but, as a Mother, she loves us way too much to let us stay there. If the same behavior during an audience with the President, would that be ‘tolerated’?

One time we were sharing a pew with an older gentleman who was openly reading a book on philosophy while Mass was going on. His wife went up to do the readings, and after Mass I turned to him and said,

“You must love your wife very much, to accompany her to Mass like this.”

He glared, suspicious. “What do you mean?”

I pointed to his book. “Naturally I thought you were simply visiting—not a practicing Catholic—since you were reading. I know several couples who do not share the same faith, and the wife goes alone to Mass. I think it’s terrific that you come to church with her, even if you aren’t Catholic yourself.”

He still brings his book sometimes—but he smiles at us. And he keeps coming back.

Now, if I had gone up to him and said, “You are being a HUGE distraction, and a bad example to my kids, by reading in church. Stop it!” What would that have accomplished?

A few weeks after my comment, he DID go up to receive Eucharist. And I continue to pray for him, knowing that each time he sees me he is reminded of how his actions (even non-distracting ones, such as reading a book) are affecting others. But always done in charity—and without disturbing my own peace.

See the difference?

Absolutely! Your story reminds me of this wonderful quote from Louis Lavelle:

    Gentleness is not the same as indulgence for the faults of another; rather it is the recongition of his existence and his presence in the world. With the practice of gentleness, his mere existence ceases to be an offense to us; we no longer try to thwart him or destroy him, we accept him; we are happy that he should be. We enjoy his existence, so to say, with him. We see it as an invitation to a spiritual cohabitation, physical cohabitation being no more than an image of this. Gentleness is active good will towards other men, not for what they are only, but for what they might be. It enables us to see many possibilites which a rougher hand would force undergound or blight, and which, perhaps, would never come to the light of day and bear fruit were it not for the attention and confidence we have shown. Gentleness enables us to accept all the laws of our human condition, and in so doing, to rise superior to them. He who revolts against these laws shows how deeply he resents them and is their slave, but he who accepts them in a spirit of gentlenss penetrates through them and fills them with light. Of these laws also it must be said that their yoke is easy and their burden light…True gentleness is so considerate, so tactful and so active that, when we meet it, we are always astonished that it can do us so much good, while at the same time apparently giving us nothing

Oh, how lovely!

I hope you don’t mind. I took the liberty of reprinting the quote in today’s post at Mommy Monsters. Thanks for making my day!

Distractions are there and here in Florida. I live in Tampa. My parish is Christ the King in Tampa.  I enjoy my distraction. YES, ENJOY THEM.  Most of them are little kids. FORGET THE CRY ROOM.  WE DON’T do cry rooms in Florida. It makes people remember that older people are not the only ones here. 

My prayer does not have to be perfect. The blank with that. Perfect by what standard?  I have learned that the more laid back I am the better my prayer. God loves me the way I am . 

I thank the Father for living here because of all the blessings. Being a teacher I get into the theme parks here for free. My husband gets in for a serious discount. Naw, don’t have to be perfect, just thankful.  I am also thankful for our diocese radio station WBVM 90. fm.  So many blessings here. 

Just let the Holy Spirit take over my prayer —- we are okay with that.  God loves me where I am at.  Mass is time to chill and thank and worship God before going to bbq on or near the beach on Sunday.  He loves us.