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Meet the Faith & Family bloggers. We invite you to join us in encouraging and helping the Faith & Family community grow in faith!

Danielle Bean

Danielle Bean
Danielle Bean, a mother of eight, is Editorial Director of Faith & Family. She is author of My Cup of Tea, Mom to Mom, Day to Day, and most recently Small Steps for Catholic Moms. Though she once struggled to separate her life and her work, the two …
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Rachel Balducci

Rachel Balducci
Rachel Balducci is married to Paul and they are the parents of five lively boys and one precious baby girl. She is the author of How Do You Tuck In A Superhero?, and is a newspaper columnist for the Diocese of Savannah, Georgia. For the past four years, she has …
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Lisa Hendey

Lisa Hendey
Lisa Hendey is the founder and editor of CatholicMom.com, a Catholic web site focusing on the Catholic faith, Catholic parenting and family life, and Catholic cultural topics. Most recently she has authored The Handbook for Catholic Moms. Lisa is also employed as webmaster for her parish web sites. …
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Arwen Mosher

Arwen Mosher
Arwen Mosher lives in southeastern Michigan with her husband Bryan and their young children Camilla and Blaise. She has a bachelor's degree in theology. She dreads laundry, craves sleep, loves to read novels and do logic puzzles, and can't live without tea. Her personal blog site is ABC Family. …
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Rebecca Teti

Rebecca Teti
Rebecca Teti is married to Dennis and has four children (3 boys, 1 girl) who -- like yours no doubt -- are pious and kind, gorgeous, and can spin flax into gold. A Washington, DC, native, she converted to Catholicism while an undergrad at the U. Dallas, where she double-majored in …
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Robyn Lee

Robyn Lee
Robyn Lee is the managing editor of Faith & Family magazine. She is (yikes!) an almost 30 year-old, single lady, living in Connecticut with her two cousins in a small bungalow-style kit house built by her great uncle in the 1950s. She also conveniently lives next door to her sister, brother-in-law …
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Hallie Lord

Hallie Lord
Hallie Lord married her dashing husband, Dan, in the fall of 2001 (the same year, coincidentally, that she joyfully converted to the Catholic faith). They now happily reside in the deep South with their two energetic boys and two very sassy girls. In her *ample* spare time, Hallie enjoys cheap wine, …
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Fr. John Bartunek, LC

Fr. John Bartunek, LC

Fr John Bartunek, LC, STL, received his BA in History from Stanford University in 1990, graduating Phi Beta Kappa. He comes from an evangelical Christian background and became a member of the Catholic Church in 1991. After college he worked as a high school history teacher, drama director, and …
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Guest Bloggers

Kate Lloyd

Kate Lloyd
Kate Lloyd is a rising senior, and a political science major at Thomas More College of Liberal Arts in New Hampshire. While not in school, she lives in Whitehall PA, with her mom, dad, five sisters and little brother. She needs someone to write a piece about how it's possible to …
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Elizabeth Foss

Elizabeth Foss
Elizabeth Foss, an award winning columnist for the Arlington Catholic Herald, published her first book, Real Learning: Education in the Heart of My Home in 2003. The book is now in its third printing. Her popular blog, In the Heart of My Home is a source of inspiration and support for Catholic women …
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In Defense of the Holly Jolly Holiday

When did the Good News become bad news?

One sign Christmas is near is the mournful chorus bemoaning its approach. Seen the headlines in supermarket magazines? The decorations, gifts, traditional delicacies, church services, time with loved ones — it’s all so stressful, they complain.

Last year, one columnist proclaimed, “The weight of the season is grotesque and it squashes many.” Christmas? Grotesque?

Ladies’ magazines trot out annual tips for slogging through the season: Attend family gatherings if you must, but don’t eat anything served (no additional Christmas pounds for you!). Dispense with Christmas cards (send e-mail at a more convenient time). Holiday baking? Don’t bother. Buy your goodies and scented candles to mimic that fresh-baked smell. Gift-giving? Pare down your list to the bare essentials, give them all gift certificates and schedule some stress-free alone time.

You deserve it after the year you’ve had.

When did the Good News become bad news? It’s understandable from non-believers, but surprising numbers of Christians get in on the act. I don’t know how the world is supposed to rejoice when Christians don’t. Our Advent preparation consists largely of complaining about how much there is to prepare.

I prefer what Faith & Family magazine described on the cover of its Winter issue a couple of years ago: “Over-the-Top Christmas.”

Nietzsche famously said the difficult thing was not to have a festival, but to find anyone capable of celebrating it. While hardly the Christian’s friend, Nietzsche is unsurpassed as a diagnostician of modernity’s troubles. For people without faith, no true celebration is possible, because all festivity is ultimately an affirmation of the goodness of existence. Put another way, celebration takes place within the culture of life. The culture of death literally cannot celebrate, though it may fake it.

In his In Tune with the World, Joseph Pieper reflects on the elements necessary for celebration. They include: a reason to celebrate, sacrifice, time of preparation and tangible expression of the reality celebrated. Let’s look at these.

A reason to celebrate
Festivals connect us to an actual event. Pieper notes you can’t have a good party about abstract ideas. That’s why there’s no “Democracy Day,” but there is Independence Day. A feast survives only so long as the participants are attached to the meaning of the feast. When we revered the good example of the father of our country, we celebrated Washington’s Birthday. The unofficial change to “Presidents Day” pretty much killed the holiday, because it emptied it of meaning and occasion. Similarly, it is belief in the birth of Jesus and the significance of the incarnation that make Christmas worth celebrating. Generic “season’s greetings,” while inoffensive, undermine Christmas because they detach us from the festive occasion.

Sacrifice
A feast day implies a conscious sacrifice of time and the money that could be earned in labor. Festivity means putting aside usual activities in favor of something which, while not useful in the usual sense, is good in itself. Our inability to see “the point” of Christmas celebrations — to feel ourselves put out by “having” to go through with them — reveals at least in part the idea that nothing not strictly “useful” can be worthwhile. This is utilitarianism, not Christianity.

Preparation
The most important element of any feast is something over which we have no control. It is that indescribable “connection” that sweeps us up into the celebration. We can’t make it happen; it’s purely God’s gift. What we can do is prepare ourselves to receive the gift. The Church, ever the wise psychologist, has given us Advent to make our souls fit vessels for the graces to be poured out at Christmas. The more time we take during Advent to pray, to repent, to remember the poor, the more we connect ourselves to the ground of the coming feast, and ensure that if God sends a special grace our way, we won’t miss it. “Merry Christmas” is more than a variation on “Hello.” It is a way of wishing the person’s Christmas celebration may be successful. “May you be swept up into the joy of the Incarnation.”

Practical expression
This is where the traditional customs that seem to cause such consternation enter in. Decorations and gifts are properly understood as manifestations of an irrepressible joy in our hearts. The coming of Jesus makes us so happy, we want to do something to share the sweet joy with others.

What about commercialism? Of course it is a problem. Every celebration contains within itself the seed of excess, which despoils happiness. We have to practice the virtue of moderation, even on feast days.

But moderation is called for in moderation too!

Is the fact that many people miss the point a reason for Christians to throw out the whole celebration? Embodied spirits need to give joy concrete expression. This is why the carol recommends:

Make your house fair as you are able, trim the hearth and set the table.

When my local merchants put out their Christmas wares, I have no way of knowing if they are manifesting inner delight at the coming of Christ or simply trying to make a buck. I don’t much care. If the village atheist’s living turns on helping me celebrate the birth of Christ, I have to believe there’s a good buried there somewhere.

This season the usual bogeymen are busy suppressing Christmas in the public square. Let’s not hasten their success by whining.

Fight back. This Christmas, choose some tradition you love and do it more. If anyone complains of stress, say, “Christ is born. Have another eggnog.”

—Rebecca Teti is contributing editor of Faith & Family magazine and Faith & Family Live blogger extraordinaire. This column originally appeared in our sister publication, the National Catholic Register.


Comments

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Oh my gosh Rebecca, thank you so much for writing this.  I really needed it.  God is answering my prayers this Advent-Christmas season!!

 

I was talking with a friend yesterday about how stressful this time of year can be.  Thank you for this reminder that busyness needn’t be stressful if it’s pointed in a good direction.  I’m going to send this article to my friend in the hope that it helps her too.

 

What a beautiful post!!!!  This is such attitude that is so sorely lacking in our culture today.  One of my favorite Christmas quotations is from Dickens’ A Christmas Carol:

. . . and it was always said of him that he knew how to keep Christmas well.  May that be truly said of us, and all of us . . .

 

In awe that Nitzche understood something of what today so many do not.

 

I love this, Rebecca! Thank you so much!

 

This post rocks, Rebecca!!!  Thank you!!!  Love the last line.

 

What an uplifting article. Thank you. Just what I needed to hear today.

 

Lovely post—so very true. Thanks for the reminder!

 

I love that last part : “Christ is Born have another eggnog!”

 

Yes, I always feel sorry for people who don’t celebrate Christmas. It is like living in Narnia pre-Aslan: always winter and never Christmas. Christmas is the fulcrum of the year, the point on which everything turns. Thank you for this, I was beginning to be overwhelmed by all the “musts”. Now I will prepare with more focus. Blessed Advent!

 

Thank you for this inspirational article.  I’m printing it out to put in my Christmas planner, right up in front.

 

What do other ladies think about involving husbands in the Christmas planning?  I feel like holidays in our house wouldn’t happen if I didn’t do everything to plan them.  While I understand that women are the guardians of celebrations it would also be nice to have my husband be involved.  What do other families do about sharing the ‘sacrifice’ of preparing for Christmas?

 

Rebecca,
Thanks so much for this.  I’ve been reading Father Schall on similar topics lately, and was so hoping to see a prominent article on this theme.  Have a wonderful Advent!


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