Sunday Morning Scramble
7 Tips for Attending Mass With Young Children
by Kate Wicker
in Faith
on Tuesday, June 23, 2009 6:00 AM
Any parent knows Mass with defiant toddlers, wiggly preschoolers, and teething babies can be anything but peaceful.
Yet, even though celebrating Mass with little ones underfoot may sometimes leave something to be desired, you are being spiritually fed. And so are your children.
“[Baptism] places an indelible mark on the soul and opens the child to receive spiritual graces,” explains Melanie Bettinelli, a mom of two young daughters who’s expecting a baby in July. “Spiritually, children are already equipped to ‘get something’ out of Mass, not by me but by God. I firmly believe they do receive graces by being at Mass and that I receive graces by bringing them.”
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me.” So let them come to Christ, using these survival tips:
Choose your seats wisely.
Although some parents prefer sitting in the back where they can make a quick exit if necessary, many find sitting up front is key to keeping kids’ attention. Another tip? Use peer pressure to your advantage. “We like to sit behind families who have well-behaved kids a few years older than ours. My daughters really look up to the older girls, so they mimic their Mass behaviors,” says Deidre Mundy, a mom of three little ones.
Beware of cry rooms.
If your child is being disruptive, it might be tempting to retreat to a cry room. But consider heading to the vestibule instead. “Cry rooms are usually pure chaos and aren’t really a valid option if you’re trying to teach your child proper behavior,” says Mundy. “It’s like saying, ‘You’re behaving badly, so I’m punishing you by making you spend the rest of Mass at the playground.’”
Make sure physical needs are met before Mass.
“Low blood sugar makes kids crankier, so feed your small children a nutritionally dense, high-protein snack before you leave the house. Cheddar cheese or peanut butter usually works for us,” Mundy says.
Bring along a kids’ “Mass survival kit.”
But do your best so steer clear of bringing a bag of toys to entertain your kids.
“I don’t bring toys or food,” Bettinelli says. “Babies can play with a plastic rosary or flip through a board book about the Mass or saints. I want them to learn that Mass is not a time for play but prayer.”
Make prayer a way of life.
We can’t expect children to be as pious as saints if the extent of their spiritual life is Sunday Mass. “Find ways of making your faith a part of the fabric of your daily lives. Especially engage children’s senses, with pictures, statues, holy water, and rosaries. Children are tactile and interactive,” Bettinelli says. “We’re so lucky as Catholics to have a liturgy that is so physical and so engaging and to have so many beautiful ways of making faith concrete and physical.”
Bettinelli also suggests encouraging children to use their body to worship. At home, practice the Sign of the Cross and genuflecting.
Encourage children’s participation to the best of their ability.
“We usually let our toddlers and preschoolers hold the hymnals for the family. We make sure every child gets a coin to put in the collection, and we teach them to shake hands politely,” Mundy says. This makes children feel like they’re a part of the celebration instead of just hapless bystanders.
Be realistic.
To be human is to be fallible, and children are little, naïve humans. Even if you do everything right, they’re going to sometimes stumble (and scream). When they do, know you’re not alone. “On really bad days, I say a prayer to the kids’ guardian angels or pray a few Hail Marys. Jesus was a wiggly-legged toddler once, too,” says Mundy. “If I have to, I take the kids to the back – where I bless them with holy water before and after their timeouts.”
Finally, remember God’s graces abound even amidst the chaos of parenthood. “I’ll be the first to admit Mass is not a restful experience like it often – but not always – was before I had children, “ Bettinelli says. “But I think God works through my obedience to Him, and perhaps a more restful experience would not be nearly so beneficial to my soul.”
—Kate Wicker is a freelance writer and mom of three girls. Visit her at KateWicker.com.
Resources:
image credit: Mom with Toddler
image credit: Baby Girl
By submitting this form, you give Faith And Family Magazine permission to publish this comment.
Comments will be published at our discretion, and may be edited for clarity and length. For best formatting, please
limit your response to one paragraph and don't hit "enter" to force line breaks.
Print Blog
Email a Friend
